


Confronting Fear

by DRHPaints



Category: Bill Hader - Fandom, IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King, IT Chapter 2, IT Chapter Two - Fandom, richie tozier - Fandom
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Comedy, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Hand Jobs, Homophobic Language, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Internalized Homophobia, Long-Term Relationship(s), M/M, Richie Tozier - Freeform, Richie Tozier's Stand Up Act, Smut, Stand Up Comedy, Switching
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:33:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 21,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25702873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DRHPaints/pseuds/DRHPaints
Summary: Once again, Richie Tozier drunkenly takes a man back to his hotel room and wakes up the next morning full of regret. But this time when he tries to kick him out, Theo just won’t go.
Relationships: Richie Tozier/Original Male Character(s)
Kudos: 17





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’m not quite sure where this fic is going yet, so I’ll add tags as I go along. Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read. If you enjoy it, please leave a comment or come say hello on tumblr at fandomtransmandom :-)

Laughter of the crowd dying away, Richie adjusted his hold on the microphone.  
“Does anyone else worry that _Toy Story_ might be real because all you did as a kid was make your toys fuck?” He smirked and the audience laughed. “Yeah, if my toys were coming to life when I was away, all they were doing was group therapy sessions,” he paused for more laughter. “G.I. Joe was just sitting there like,” Richie hunched over, and mimed smoking. “You don’t know the things I’ve seen, man. The things he makes me do. The horror, _the horror_ …”   
Rocking back on his heels, Richie did his best to soak in the roar of the crowd, but as usual any joy he might’ve gleaned was overwhelmed by his anxiety over the next bit. Regardless, the rest of the set killed, and in the lobby afterwards, he spent the better part of two hours signing autographs and taking pictures with audience members.  
Feeling a tapping at his shoulder, he looked down and saw the diminutive proprietor of the comedy club. “Want a drink, Richie?”  
“Bourbon. Double,” he muttered over his shoulder, scrawling his signature for the hundredth time on a copy of his second album for some neckbeard who was telling him he was ‘fucking hilarious’ as though he were saying something original. The room began to thin out, and as Richie took the final few photos, hand cramping around the sharpie as he wrote _Richie “Trashmouth” Tozier_ yet again, he noticed a man standing at the bar, watching him. Wearing a black suit vest with slacks over a lavender shirt, sleeves rolled up to the elbow, the man peered at him over the top of his drink before turning back to face the bartender and raising a finger for another.  
Signing the last autograph, Richie stood and wiped his hands on his suit jacket before casually strolling over to the bar, taking a seat four stools away from the man in lavender.  
“Can I get a double bourbon, please?” Richie asked the bartender, fishing in his pocket for his wallet.  
“Put that on my tab, Miles,” the man said, holding up a finger again. “Unless you have any objection?” He raised an eyebrow in Richie’s direction.  
Sticking out his lower lip, Richie held his hands face up, accepting the drink from the bartender and tossing half of it back in one pull.   
“Solid show,” the man nodded at him. Richie turned to face him. The way he looked at Richie made him nervous. His green eyes didn’t seem to blink as often as normal people. It was as if he could see into Richie somehow, see through him, as if he were being studied.   
Squirming on the stool, Richie nodded. “Thanks, yeah. It went alright, I guess,” he threw back the rest of the bourbon, relishing the burn.  
“You want another?” The man asked him, tilting his head, which caused his sandy brown hair to fall in a buoyant wave that made Richie flutter inside. Desperately wanting that feeling to go away, he figured more bourbon might do the trick.  
Richie nodded. “Sure, thanks,” the man raised a finger again to Miles and smiled. Strolling around, he approached Richie’s stool and he felt his heart rate jump as the man extended a hand.  
“Hello there, Richie. I’m Theo, by the way,” holding his hand out, Richie stared at it for a moment, finally grasping it briefly.  
“Nice to meet you,” Richie gave a half smile and frantically tried to push away the thought that crept into his brain. _His hands are so soft…_  
Miles set his bourbon before him and Richie drained it in one swallow. His eyes were having trouble focusing now, and he touched a hand to his glasses to reassure himself that they were still on his face.  
They sat silently while Theo nursed his drink, then he cleared his throat. “So, girlfriend, eh?” He turned away from him to face the wall of bottles behind the bar.  
“What’s that?” Richie blinked, trying to bring him into focus.  
“In your act,” Theo swirled the ice at the bottom of his drink. “You mention you have a girlfriend.” Turning back to face him, he raised an eyebrow.  
Swallowing hard, Richie nodded. “Oh…yup. Yeah.”  
Theo narrowed his eyes, nodding slowly and finishing his drink.  
Richie had to look away. “I…I think I’ll have another one.” He fidgeted with his hands on top of the bar.  
“You sure? You’ve had quite a bit already…” Theo looked at him, concerned.  
Heart hammering, Richie stared up into his emerald eyes and took a deep breath. “I just need one more...” he said meaningfully.  
Meeting his deep blue eyes, Theo finally seemed to blink for the first time, and nodded. “Miles?” He raised a finger and gestured to Richie. Setting him up again, Richie ran his thumb over the condensation on the glass for a second before drinking it down, barely able to feel the sting at this point.  
“Okay then,” Richie attempted to stand up from his stool and slid off, nearly tumbling.  
“Whoa, _whoa_ ,” Theo caught him. “Hold on there,” he propped him up with one arm, reaching in his pocket with the other hand for a silver money clip and pulling out several bills.  
“Here you go, Miles. Thank you.” The bartender smiled and waved, and Richie spun around, his arms seeming to come along much later. Weaving through the lobby, he barely made it out of the doors of the club unassisted, reaching the sidewalk, swaying dangerously.  
“Hey, um…” he pointed at Theo, who stood in front of him calmly, hands in his pockets. “Theo? Right?”  
He nodded and smiled. “Yes, Richie. That’s right.”  
Richie looked around. It was as if he was trying to be subtle, but really he was throwing his body from side to side and barely able to take in his surroundings. “Do you, um…you wanna see what my hotel looks like?”  
Theo tilted his head. “I’m not sure that’s the best idea, Richie.”  
“Why not?” Richie stumbled a little closer to him.  
“Well,” he sighed. “You’re very drunk, Richie.”  
Richie raised his hands in exasperation. “Who gives a shit?”  
“You’re sure?” Theo raised an eyebrow.  
Lowering his head, Richie looked almost angry. “I fucking asked, didn’t I?”  
Smirking, Theo nodded. “Alright. Let’s go.”  
The hotel was just around the corner from the venue, but their progress was slow as Theo had to keep redirecting Richie, hand at the small of his back, helping him to stay standing. Arriving at his door, Theo watched Richie’s hand holding the key card, hovering in front of the slot.  
“ _Shit_ ,” he said as he hopelessly missed for the third time.  
“Here,” reaching forward, Theo took it out of his hand. “Why don’t you let me do that?”  
Richie nodded and he opened the door.   
As soon as it shut behind them, Richie pushed Theo up against the door, mouth moving sloppily against his own, hand fumbling between his legs.  
“ _Whoa_ , Richie, hang on,” Theo grabbed his wrist, but Richie shook his head and continued mauling him.  
“No,” he tried pulling at the buttons of Theo’s vest, and was nearly about to tear them, Richie’s tongue sliding in and around his mouth as he dragged Theo back toward the bed and laid them down. Taking Theo’s hand, Richie brought it to the crotch of his pants, humming against his mouth.  
Theo broke away to breathe. “Richie, maybe we should slow down…” he tried to retract his hand, but Richie held him firm.  
“No, please,” Richie looked at him. “ _Please_ ,” his voice softened. “I need it.”  
Reaching up to comb his hand through Richie’s dark curls, Theo lowered his voice. “What do you need, Richie?”  
“Just,” Richie closed his eyes, swallowing. “Just suck me, okay? Just fucking suck me, _please_.” His voice broke and Theo thought he might actually start crying.   
Looking down at him sadly, Theo ran his thumb over his prominent cheekbone. “Okay, Richie. I will.” Leaning down he kissed his light pink lips, undoing Richie’s pants and sneaking his hand inside. Richie nodded underneath him when his fingers encircled his half hard cock, and Theo was amazed he was able to achieve that much given how much alcohol was in his system.   
Breaking away to brush a kiss below his ear, Theo scooted down the bed and lowered Richie’s pants and boxers slightly before wrapping his lips around the tip of his cock. Immediately Richie’s fingers buried themselves in his hair, surprisingly tender as they massaged his scalp. Sucking for a couple of minutes, Richie got a little more erect, but not much, and soon Theo felt his hands fall away, followed shortly by the sound of Richie snoring above him.   
Pulling off, Theo shook his head and grinned. He lifted Richie’s boxers and put him away, taking off his shoes and pants, folding them neatly on the chair. Removing his glasses, Theo set them on the bedside stand, sliding an arm underneath Richie and carefully working off his suit jacket. Richie snored on, oblivious, until Theo had him comfortably in his undershirt and boxers, bringing the blanket up to his chest. Filling a glass with water, he set it next to Richie’s side of the bed in case he woke up while Theo was sleeping in the middle of the night, stripped down to his own boxer briefs and undershirt, and climbed in next to him, turning off the light.  
**

Groaning, Richie lifted a hand to shield his eyes from the beams of light peeking around the edge of the curtains, rubbing his face, scrambling on the bedside stand for his glasses.  
“Good morning, Richie.”  
“The fuck?” Richie peered out of one eye. The blurry form of a man stood next to the bed. “Who the fuck are you?” He sat up, finally getting ahold of his glasses and pushing them onto his face. They were filthy. Attempting to clean them on his undershirt, he put them back on, but mostly just managed to smear the smudges around.  
“Well, good afternoon, actually. I’m Theo,” the man smiled at him. “You brought me back here last night for sex. Here,” now that he could see him somewhat clearly, Richie saw that Theo offered him a glass of water, the other hand holding two pieces of toast on a napkin.   
“Oh. Right.” Richie looked off to the side and took the glass from him.  
Theo fished around in his vest pocket, extracting two pills. “Take these,” he held out his hand. “It’s Tylenol.” Richie eyed him suspiciously and Theo tilted his head. “Richie, if I wanted to kill you, I would’ve smothered you last night when your snoring was keeping me awake.”  
Accepting the pills, Richie tossed them back with half of the glass of water. Theo held out the toast. “Sorry it’s cold. I got it at the continental breakfast this morning. You should try to eat it, if you can.” He sat on the edge of the bed.  
Hesitantly Richie took the toast from him, setting it in his lap. “Okay, um…thanks and all, but you need to leave.”   
Theo cocked his head at him, unblinking. “No.”  
Richie narrowed his eyes as him. “Excuse me?”  
“I thought you might say that. No. You’re going to listen to me say a few things first. After that, I’ll gladly go. But you need to hear it.” Theo looked at him seriously.  
Shaking his head, Richie clenched his teeth. “No, you need to get the fuck outta here, man.”  
Theo stared at him intently. “Let me say my piece, Richie. Then I will,” he crossed his hands in his lap. “I would hazard to say this isn’t the first time this has happened to you. In fact, I’m guessing you’ve woken up in hotel rooms all over the country next to strange men, am I right?” Richie just glared at him, so Theo continued. “And I bet, when you try to kick us out, many go quietly. Oh sure, some probably tell you to go to hell. And I bet there have been a few who have tried to get some money out of you.” Richie’s eyes shifted nervously. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to do that. I don’t need it, and even if I did, I would never do something so heinous. But Richie,” Theo took a deep breath. “You can’t keep doing this. You’re hurting yourself, it’s not—“  
“Dude, seriously, get the fu—“ Richie’s voice was dangerous, but Theo just politely held up a hand.  
“Please Richie, just let me finish. You don’t have anything to be ashamed of. This part of you? This thing you’re fighting against? It’s okay. It can be wonderful, even, if you let it. You don’t have to declare it to the world, but at some point you have to face it inside. Because if you keep drinking, keep burying it and warring against yourself, only letting it out in those hazy moments when you haul a stranger back to your hotel room for a drunken fuck…Richie, you’ll spend your whole life hating yourself. And you deserve more than that. So much more.”  
Theo stayed quite for a moment while Richie stared at his lap. Then very softly he said, “You should try to eat some toast.”  
Lifting a piece to his mouth, Richie took a small bite, chewing and continuing to look down. His tongue felt thick in his mouth, and when he finally managed to swallow, he cleared his throat. “Why…why are you being so nice to me?” He asked in a small voice, unable to look up at Theo.  
Sighing, Theo smiled sadly. “Because I’ve been where you are, Richie. And it’s a terrible, depressing place. I couldn’t leave you there alone. Not if there’s something I could do to help.”  
Richie took another bite of toast, washing it down with the rest of the water. Theo took up the glass, refilling it and resuming his spot at the edge of the bed, silently and patiently waiting while Richie ate his toast.   
Finishing, he bunched up the napkin and set it on the bedside stand. “I’m…” Richie wiped his fingers on the sheets. “I’m sorry. I treated you like shit…”  
“Yeah. You did.” Theo nodded, and Richie finally raised his eyes. There was pain there. Richie never looked for it in all the men before. He would see disgust, amusement sometimes, often anger when he told them to fuck off the next morning, but he never looked long or close enough to see their pain. A wave of shame washed over him and he suddenly felt sick.  
“How are you doing, Richie?” Theo tilted his head.   
Looking to the ceiling, Richie shook his head, blinking. “I’m a shitty person.”  
Reaching out, Theo delicately placed his fingertips on Richie’s hand, startling him slightly. “Hey, Richie, look at me,” he stared into his stormy blue eyes. “No, okay? You’re just human. You’re figuring this out, just like the rest of us. Of course you’re going to make mistakes and hurt some people along the way. The only solution is to learn from it and do better going forward.”  
Nodding, Richie turned over his hand, taking Theo’s in his large palm and making small circles with his thumb. “Thank you,” he said in a voice barely above a whisper.   
They sat there holding hands for a long time before Theo softly asked, “What do you need right now, Richie?”  
Taking a deep breath and letting it out through puffed cheeks, Richie lifted the collar of his shirt over his nose. “I need to take a shower. I fucking stink.” He smiled.  
“Did you want to take one together?” Theo asked calmly, looking at him with those barely blinking green eyes.   
Richie’s body tightened up, nose flaring and eyes shifting away. “Oh, um…” He could hear his own heart beating and his throat was suddenly dry. “Yeah, yeah…okay.”  
Nodding, Theo patted his hand and stood, beginning to remove his vest and draping it over a chair delicately before doing the same with his shirt and slacks. Not sure if it was rude to watch or not, Richie got out of bed, feeling a little light headed as he stood up and went into the bathroom to turn on the water. Theo appeared in the doorway naked and Richie’s eyes went wide. He was quite handsome, body lightly muscled with a smattering of light brown hair on his chest and between his legs, but Richie did his best not to look down there.  
Setting his glasses on the counter, Richie pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it on the floor, hooking his thumbs under his boxers and glancing at Theo nervously before unceremoniously pushing them down as well. Theo gestured for him to step into the shower first, and as the water hit his face, plastering his black curls to his head, Richie breathed in the steam, letting his shoulders relax.   
“Do you want me to get your back?” Theo asked, armed with a washcloth. Looking shyly over at him, Richie nodded. Soaping up Richie’s expansive shoulders, Theo used his other hand to help wipe away the suds that gathered, following the elegant curve of his pale flesh and stopping above his ass, not wanting to push him. Rubbing the washcloth over his strong arms, guiding him to raise them so he could clean underneath, Richie quietly allowed him to position his body as needed.   
Taking him by the elbows, Theo directed Richie to turn around and face him, and noticed that he’d grown hard while he was washing him. He was also trembling.  
Theo cupped a hand around his sharp jawline. “Do you want me to touch you, Richie?” Staring at the trickling water flowing past his feet, Richie nodded. Theo desperately wanted to kiss those soft pink lips, but he left that up to Richie, lowering his hand and encircling his stiff cock in his strong fingers, he began stroking.  
Holding onto Theo’s shoulders, Richie closed his eyes tight. Never once had he let a man touch him when he was sober, and it was equal parts terrifying and exhilarating. Theo’s wrist worked quickly, twisting with every upstroke, stopping sometimes to rub a thumb over the sensitive head of Richie’s thick cock, his mouth falling open as he began to thrust into his warm fist.  
Leaning forward, Richie laid his forehead in the crook of Theo’s neck, breathing hard as his hand flashed between them. Tightening his grip, Theo used his other arm to hold Richie, wrapping around his back, and Richie’s face turned into his neck, arms clenching around his shoulders, hand in his hair as he whimpered, hips rocking forward into Theo’s hand as he clung to him.   
Richie came with a shuddering cry, laying all his weight on Theo who had to slide his ankle back against the side of the tub to make sure they didn’t fall. Catching his breath, Richie was grateful for the rivulets of water streaming down his face, because as he turned back and began washing his curls, Theo couldn’t see the tears stinging his eyes.


	2. 2

Toweling off, Richie rummaged through his suitcase for a fresh t-shirt and boxers. He never bothered putting his things in hotel room dressers. At most, he was there for a handful of days and he didn’t see the point. He watched as Theo meticulously got back into his clothes, smoothing the edges as he went and tugging down the vest when he finished buttoning it.   
“Well,” he turned to Richie, running a hand over his still wet hair. “I suppose I’ll let you be.”  
Richie rubbed his thumb over the jeans he held in his hands. “Oh…” he swallowed, looking around the room. “You know, you could…stay. If you want. I’m doing another show here tonight and, um…” Staring hard at the denim, the words didn’t seem to come to him. “Only if you want to.”  
Hands in his pockets, Theo nodded slowly. “I want to.”  
Letting out a breath he wasn’t aware he’d been holding, Richie smiled. Theo wondered if he knew how much a genuine smile truly illuminated his face. Bright pink lips spreading wide, left eye crinkling just a bit more than the right. He was radiant.  
“Good.” Richie nodded, pulling on his jeans.   
Looking around, Theo tilted his head. “Would you like to go get some real food?”   
“Yeah,” Richie patted his little belly. “But is there anything good within walking distance? I didn’t get a rental since the hotel was so close to the club.”  
“My car is back at the club,” Theo stated. Richie nodded and they left, walking quietly side by side, Theo pausing to hold out his keys in front of a black BMW.  
“Nice ride, man,” Richie raised his eyebrows appreciatively.  
Theo glanced at him. “Thanks, _man_.” He rolled his eyes and held the door open for Richie, who got slightly flustered at such treatment, but climbed in the passenger seat just the same.   
Driving to his favorite diner, Theo and Richie slid into a booth and waited for their server to arrive. Richie nervously patted the table’s surface, bopping his head. He often found it difficult to stop moving when he was anxious.  
“So,” he said after thirty seconds of silence he couldn’t tolerate any longer. “What do you do?”  
Theo sat before him, hands folded on the table, almost mannequin-like in his stillness. Richie found his calm demeanor unnerving. “I’m a writer.”  
“Oh yeah? Cool.” Richie frowned appraisingly. “Anything I would’ve heard of?”  
Smiling, Theo shook his head. “Doubt it.”  
A middle-aged waitress, fingernails painted a shocking shade of neon green, arrived to take their order. Handing her the menus and thanking her, they turned back to each other.  
“So,” Theo looked at him unblinkingly. “Where to next?”  
Richie puffed out his cheeks. “Well, after tonight, tomorrow is a travel day. Then I have three nights at the Comedy Works in Colorado.”  
Nodding knowingly, Theo smiled. “Oh, that’s a great club. Colorado is a good comedy town.”  
“Okay man, how the fuck do you know that?” Richie narrowed his eyes at him. “No offense, but you don’t strike me as a ‘barrel of laughs’ kinda guy.” He wiggled his hands in the air. “Why did you come to last nights’ show, anyway?” He hadn’t meant to come off so confrontational, but as per usual, Richie’s mouth ran away with out his permission.  
But Theo just smiled slowly, nodding. “Yes, I can see why I come off that way. But I have a deep love for comedy.” For the first time he looked away from Richie, studying his hands. “My former husband was a comedian. I went on the road with him many times, so I’m familiar with most of the clubs around the country.”  
“Oh alright,” Richie nodded. “You guys split up?”  
Reaching for his water, Theo took a sip, replacing it deliberately before responding. “He died.”  
“Oh.” Richie swallowed. “Oh, I’m…I’m so sorry. That’s really rough.”  
Nodding slowly, Theo returned his viridescent gaze to Richie. “Yes. I loved him very much.” Unsure what else to say, Richie just nodded. “So, I like to check out the comedians when they’re in town.” Theo smiled. “Guess I like the nostalgia.”  
Richie smiled at him sadly. Soon their food arrived.  
“Oh, fuck yeah,” Richie said, taking the top bun off his burger and splattering ketchup on before mashing a handful of fries on top of that and replacing the bun, lifting it to his mouth and taking a tremendous bite. Theo watched, vaguely horrified, as Richie ate. It was like seeing an animal attack a rotting carcass, meat juice and ketchup dripping down his chin, pausing every couple of bites to lick his fingers, only barely managing to keep food off of his t-shirt. Somehow he found it endearing.  
Richie noticed Theo watching him and smirking as he tucked a napkin into the collar of his shirt. “What?” He mumbled around a mouthful of masticated cow flesh.   
Shaking his head, Theo chuckled. “Nothing, Richie.” He took a careful bite of his BLT, bent over his plate so as not to get anything on his outfit while Richie mashed a handful of French fries into his face.   
Finishing several minutes before Theo, Richie went to the bathroom to wash his face and hands and patiently waited while Theo’s sandwich disappeared. Offering to pick up the check, Theo thanked Richie and they climbed back in his car.  
“Do you intend on having me stay the night, Richie?” Theo asked as he turned the ignition.  
Richie felt his face grow hot. “Oh, I, uh…I mean…if you want to…”  
Nodding, Theo pulled out of the parking place. “Great. I just want to swing by my place to grab a few things then.”  
Driving a few miles out of town, they pulled up to a massive architectural house. Peering out of the windshield, Richie thought he even saw a pool in the back.   
“Jesus fucking Christ, dude. The fuck kinda books do you write?!”  
“Fantasy.” Theo responded simply, turning off the car. “Did you want to come inside?”  
Curious, Richie shrugged. “Sure.”  
Following Theo inside, he opened the door and Richie whistled, looking around. It was spacious and airy, tastefully appointed, and even from his limited view he could see Theo didn’t skimp when it came to quality.   
“I’m just going to pack. Feel free to look around.” Theo gestured toward the living room. Hands in his pockets, Richie wandered through. Noticing a large nude painting of a man that he never thought he’d be brave enough to hang in his own home, he blushed a little, before walking over to the mantle. He saw a couple of writing awards made out to _Theodore Thomas_ , though he had no idea if they were important, and then he came across a picture of Theo laughing hard, his head leaning against a slightly older man with lighter hair who was pressing a kiss to his forehead. Picking it up, Richie looked closely, but he didn’t recognize the comedian. Unsurprising, he supposed, there was no shortage of them and he had no idea how long it had been since he passed. Richie realized he hadn’t really seen Theo laugh once yet and he ran a thumb over the photo.  
Hearing footsteps in the hall, he quickly replaced it on the mantle and turned around.   
“Okay, I’m ready,” Theo held up his bag, having changed into dark green slacks with matching vest and a gray button up. Richie nodded and they climbed back into the car and made their way back to the hotel.  
Entering the room, Richie looked at the clock. It was just after one in the afternoon and his show didn’t start until nine. He hadn’t really put much thought into how they would pass the time and somehow saying _Hey Theo, wanna play Checkers?_ struck him as painfully stupid.  
Setting down his bag, Theo approached him, drawing close, hands holding onto the fabric of the front of his shirt and peering into his face. Again, Richie felt as if he were being scanned, downloaded. Like Theo was cataloging every piece of his stubble for further review.  
“Richie, would you like to kiss me?” He asked simply.  
Blinking rapidly, Richie looked down at Theo’s hands and cleared his throat. “Y-yeah.”  
Nodding, Theo brought his face near, but held still, waiting for Richie to come the rest of the way. Licking his lips, Richie pushed forward, exhaling out of his nose as their mouths met, Theo’s hands snaking their way up his chest, one burying itself in his mass of dark curls, the other wrapping around his broad shoulders as his tongue snuck into Richie’s mouth, teasing his gently until they danced in one another’s mouths. Their heads tilted to deepen the kiss as Richie’s timid hands found their way to Theo’s waist, gradually sneaking around to his back to draw him near, Theo rejoicing in the sensation of Richie’s strong arms surrounding him.  
Walking backwards toward the bed, Theo felt the back of his knees hit and kicked off his shoes, sliding back in and grabbing the front of Richie’s t-shirt to pull him in after. Crawling on top of him, Richie’s hands began to roam, climbing up Theo’s body to caress his face and play with his hair, and when his glasses started to fog up he tossed them onto the bedside stand hastily before catching Theo’s mouth once more.  
Theo could feel the hard column of Richie’s cock growing against his thigh, and he shifted underneath him to rub his own growing erection against Richie’s, humming at the pleasant weight on top of him as Richie began to grind down. Kneading his strong back, Theo spread his legs wide to accommodate Richie, who broke away and began kissing and nipping at his neck, those large hands fumbling to get under his shirt and massage his skin.  
Reaching down to cup Richie’s ass, Theo felt him tense up on top of him and immediately returned his hand to his back.  
“Sorry.” He breathed, rubbing a thumb over Richie’s cheekbone.   
Richie shook his head. “Don’t worry about it.” But as he dove back and began kissing Theo’s exposed collarbone, he could tell Richie seemed distracted.   
Brushing his lips against Richie’s ear, he whispered. “ _Do you want me to use my mouth, Richie_?”  
Shivering, Richie felt his cock twinge at the thought. “Fuck yeah.”  
Nodding, Theo guided his shoulder to the mattress, kissing him briefly before scooting down the bed and unzipping Richie’s jeans with intent, like he was unwrapping a gift and didn’t wish to tear the wrapping paper. Richie watched with aching anticipation as Theo slowly inched his jeans, then his boxers, down his hips, only to stare at his hard cock for a minute. Again, it was like he was a scientist taking notes, and had Richie not been so desperate for Theo to touch him he would’ve laughed at the idea of a report entitled _Richie Tozier’s Cock: A Case Study_.  
Finally, Theo encircled his fingers around Richie’s thick cock, pumping once and rubbing a thumb over the sensitive head before lowering himself. Catching Richie’s gaze, Theo stared back at him as his lips wrapped around the tip, tongue flicking lightly before circling him, then hollowing his cheeks and taking half his length down in one.   
Using one hand to stroke Richie’s shaft in time with the bobbing of his head, Theo twisted his wrist with every upstroke, the other hand gently massaging his balls. He desperately wanted to rub the space between Richie’s balls and his opening, show him how delicious it could feel, but he didn’t want to push him, so he continued his ministrations as planned.  
Pressing his head into the pillow, Richie’s fingers wound into Theo’s hair as his hips began to rock forward into his warm, wet mouth.  
“ _Oh fuck. Shit. Don’t stop_ ,” Richie moaned, starting to push Theo’s head down to encourage him to go faster. Gladly obliging, Theo loved the feel of Richie’s cock burrowing deep in his throat, the sound of his moans turning into keening whimpers as he began to lose control, the feel of his massive cock pulsing under his tongue as Richie’s orgasm threatened to overwhelm him.  
“ _Fuck, I’m gonna fucking cum. I’m gonna cum in your fucking throat_ ,” Richie gasped, voice high and irregular as his body arched, tugging hard on Theo’s hair as his cum shot against the back of his tongue, salty and warm, Theo swallowing before rising and wiping his eyes, joining Richie at the head of the bed.  
Hand pushing back his messy curls, Richie let out a breath. “Fuck, that was hot.”  
Theo let out a half chuckle, pressing a kiss to the corner of his jaw before snuggling next to him. Looking over, Richie glanced down and saw the outline of Theo’s erection.  
Theo placed a hand on his chest. “Don’t worry about it, Richie. I can take care of myself. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.”  
Lifting his hand to cover Theo’s, Richie looked at him. Theo noticed he was trembling slightly. “No, um…” he cleared his throat. “No, I want to. It’s just…I’ve never done it without a few drinks in me, so…so I don’t know if I’m any good at it.”  
Carding his fingers through Richie’s curls, Theo smiled warmly. “I’m sure anything you do will be great.”  
“Okay, I’ll…I’ll try.” Richie swallowed, leaning forward to fuse their mouths together and rolling back on top of him. The way Richie moved his body, swiveling his hips, arching his back, large palms traveling over every inch of Theo’s skin, made him so hard he couldn’t stand it and he rutted shamelessly against his leg until Richie finally put his hand on him, rubbing him over his pants, Theo humming appreciatively into his mouth.  
Undoing his slacks, Richie slid a twitching hand inside and took hold of Theo’s cock, pausing to withdraw and lick his palm before replacing it and beginning to jerk him frantically. Breaking away from his mouth, Theo moaned against his ear, fingers clinging to his broad shoulders.  
“ _Oh Richie, yes, yes_!” The sounds of Theo’s desire tugged at something deep in the pit of Richie’s stomach, and as he stared at Theo’s face, his expression almost pained as he fought to look back at him, Richie bit his lip, suddenly scrambling down his body and taking him as far into his throat as he could manage, sucking hard and fast in a frenzy, saliva dripping down Theo’s cock as he strove to get him off.  
“ _Richie, FUCK_!” Theo fought to keep his hips flat on the bed, not wanting to overwhelm him, but it wasn’t easy, Richie’s wide mouth was gobbling him so eagerly he had to bunch his hands into the sheets and dig his heels into the mattress.  
Theo was positively whining above him now, but Richie didn’t let up, hands roaming over his chest while he let his mouth do all the work.  
“ _Richie, I’m gonna cum_ ,” Theo warned him, but Richie didn’t stop, moaning around the sensitive flesh of his cock as Theo came, pulsing into his mouth and rocking his head back and forth as his eyes rolled back in his head.  
Emerging, Richie wiped his mouth and flopped up next to him on the bed. Recovering a little, Theo did up his pants and looked over at him. Richie had the biggest shit-eating grin on his face, obviously proud of himself, and Theo burst out laughing, head thrown back, hands on his stomach, eyes squinted tight.  
Blinking, Richie wasn’t entirely sure what was funny, but he couldn’t help but join in, overtaken by giggles, he rocked back and forth, slapping his knee as they fell against one another in mirth. To see Theo laugh, really laugh, was a relief and a joy he didn’t know he needed, and when they finally composed themselves, wiping their eyes, Richie threw an arm around him and kissed his temple, grateful when Theo turned into him and draped a leg over his body, hand rubbing his little belly while his head rested on Richie’s firm chest.  
Drifting off, when they woke up they were a tangle of limbs and Richie’s hand slapped the bedside stand looking for his glasses.   
“Fuckingtimeizit?” He muttered sleepily.   
Peering out of one eye, Theo looked at the clock. “Almost eight.”  
“Oh shit, I gotta get ready,” Richie stumbled out of bed, heading for the shower. “Hey, are you going to come to the show?” He called from the bathroom.  
Smiling, Theo smoothed a hand over his hair. “Sure, if you want me to.”  
Richie emerged in his boxers, picking through his suitcase. “Yeah, if you don’t mind. I mean I know you already heard all the jokes…”  
“Oh, don’t worry about that,” Theo sat up. “I’ll still laugh.”  
Richie grinned at him before hopping in the shower, emerging 15 minutes later with his curls dancing in little wet ringlets that made Theo want to maul him, but he knew there was no time for that as Richie pulled on his jeans, a fresh black t-shirt, and his suit jacket.   
Walking over to the club, Richie seemed to bounce with every step, fingers fiddling at his thigh, eyes darting around the street. Theo had seen it before. Stage fright. It only got worse the closer they got, and when they entered the venue, Richie greeted the proprietor, who glanced at Theo but said nothing. Theo had met Marshall before, of course, but didn’t feel the need to explain why he was accompanying Richie.   
“Okay, I’m gonna head back stage then,” Richie nodded at him, shaking out his hands. Theo ached to kiss him, to hug him, to at least squeeze his damn hand to comfort him and let him know everything was going to be okay. But he knew that wasn’t an option.  
“I’ll be right out front,” Theo smiled. “You’ll be amazing, Richie.”  
Nodding, but not able to meet his gaze, Richie let out a deep breath and disappeared. Claiming a seat front and center, Theo swelled with pride as he watched Richie perform. Able to pick out a few nervous ticks, Theo thought no one who didn’t spend time watching him closely would ever notice as he rolled seamlessly from one killer bit to the next, crowd in the palm of his hand.   
Stepping off stage, Richie let his shoulders drop as Theo approached him.  
“You were wonderful, Richie.” He grinned at him, hands in his pockets.  
Richie nodded. “Thanks.” All he could think about was the wording he fucked up on his closer, but he tried to shake that away.  
“Should we go get something to eat?” Theo suggested. Gazing longingly at the bar across the lobby, Richie swallowed. “Yeah. Sounds good.”  
When they arrived at the restaurant, Richie scanned the menu. _They don’t even have fucking beer_ … Sighing, he folded it and gritted his teeth.  
“You alright?” Theo cocked his head.  
Richie plastered a smile on his face. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m good.”  
Ordering a soup and salad, Theo watched amazed as Richie inhaled a patty melt and fries. _How is he not as big as a house?_ Maybe all of the constant anxious movement served to keep his metabolism high, Theo figured, grinning as Richie dragged the last of his fries through a puddle of ketchup.  
They got back to the hotel and Theo stretched, stripping down to his briefs, folding his clothes and stacking them on the chair before extracting a t-shirt from his overnight bag and climbing into bed. Richie undressed down to his boxers as well, leaving his clothes in a pile on the floor before leaping into the bed, nearly launching Theo off, causing him to laugh.  
Discarding his glasses immediately, Richie took Theo by the back of the neck and joined their mouths, pinning him down, loose curls tickling Theo’s forehead as they kissed. Spreading his legs, Theo lifted his hips against him, anxious to drag Richie’s massive cock along his own. Reaching down to grab Theo’s ass, Richie gathered him close, humping against him enthusiastically, soft moans escaping him.  
“Richie,” Theo pulled back, and when Richie desperately tried to claim his mouth again he held his head back, grinning. “ _Richie, do you want to fuck me_?”  
Fingers digging into his arm, Richie nodded. “I wanna fuck you so goddamn badly.”  
Nodding, Theo tapped his shoulder so he’d let him out of the bed, going to his overnight bag and returning with a bottle of lube and a condom. Setting them delicately on the bed, Theo peeled his shirt off and stepped out of his briefs, walking both over to the chair.  
Richie watched impatiently, slithering out of his boxers and kicking them to the floor. Theo climbed back into the bed and Richie immediately snatched up the condom, bringing it to his mouth to tear it open.  
“Whoa, _whoa_ ,” Theo chuckled. “Hang on. You should really use your fingers for a little bit first. If you don’t mind, that is.”  
Gathering his eyebrows, Richie blinked. “Oh. Okay then.”  
Theo laid down in front of him and spread his legs. Richie hadn’t done this before. Well, he’d done it to himself a few times…but he never told anyone about that. Anytime he brought a guy back to his room, Richie would just bend them over and fuck them and try not to think about what he was doing.  
Lubing up his fingers, Richie looked up at Theo. “Um…how many?”  
“You can do two.” Theo smiled up at him.  
Nodding, Richie circled his middle and ring fingers over Theo’s entrance for a moment before pushing inside. Curving upwards, he felt around until Theo twitched. Then he swiped again, smirking at his jumping muscles. Beginning to pulse inside of him, Richie’s long fingers were divine as Theo started to rock back against him, driving him deeper into himself.   
“Would you…” Theo licked his lips. “Would you touch me, too, Richie?” He breathed.   
“Oh yeah, right.” Richie attempted to open the lube with his mouth and squirt some on his free hand, spilling quite a bit on the sheets but managing to get enough on himself that when he wrapped his fingers around Theo’s hard cock he moaned in appreciation.  
Pushing and pulling in sync, it wasn’t long before Theo was gasping, awash in the pleasure of Richie’s sizable hands.  
“ _Richie, I want you inside of me_.”  
He didn’t need to be told twice. Withdrawing, Richie rolled the condom over himself, lubing up his cock and applying more to Theo before positioning the head at his entrance.  
“You ready?” Richie looked at him expectantly.  
Theo nodded. “Yeah, just…start slowly, okay? It’s been a while and, well, you’re not exactly small, Richie.”  
Richie half chuckled to himself. “No problem.”   
Tipping his hips forward, they gasped in unison, Theo at the pleasant burn of the stretch, Richie at the heavenly pressure surrounding his cock.  
“Oh, _fuck_ ,” Richie breathed as he inched inside. Once fully sheathed, he held still, allowing Theo to acclimate to the sensation before slowly withdrawing and pressing forward. Claiming Theo’s cock again, Richie began to swivel his hips in time with his strokes, angling upward in an effort to hit his prostate. Lifting his legs, Theo put them over Richie’s shoulders and he grinned, kissing his calve. Establishing a rhythm, Theo moaned joyfully when Richie dove down to kiss him, mouths mashed together in the moments between panted breaths. Richie began to pound into him in earnest and Theo’s fingers dragged through his sweaty curls, pressing breathless kisses to his stubble as Richie put his head down against his neck, hand flashing between them.  
“ _Yes, Richie, yes. Don’t stop!_ ” Theo cried, body constricting around Richie as his cum shot across his abdomen and chest. Richie’s breath was warm and wet on Theo’s throat as he hammered into him.  
“ _I’m gonna cum, fuck, FUCK!_ ” Richie yelled, surprising Theo by biting him in his final moments, causing him to gasp as Richie’s hips shuttered forward before stilling. Chest heaving, Richie stayed on top of him and Theo didn’t mind. Lowering his legs, he wrapped them around Richie’s waist, eager to keep him inside for as long as he was willing to stay.  
Eventually they unraveled, Richie getting up to throw away the condom before crawling back in bed. Theo turned over, carrying Richie’s arm with him, and Richie snuggled close, kissing the back of his neck.   
**

  
Alarm blaring, Richie smacked the beside stand in an attempt to grab his phone, but only succeeded in knocking his glasses to the floor.  
“Ah, fuck,” he muttered, finally managing to turn off the noise. Feeling around on the floor blindly, he located his glasses and shoved them on his face, once again amazed he hadn’t broken them.   
“Morning.” Stretching, Theo rolled over and stood up, picking fresh briefs from his bag and pulling them on.  
Richie strode over to take his face in both hands, kissing him. Theo was smiling and it made it difficult to kiss him back. “Good morning.”  
Silently they pulled on their clothes. Theo glanced at Richie out of the corner of his eye, taking a deep breath and deciding to ask. “So, when does your flight leave?”  
He saw the features of Richie’s face settle flat. “About two hours.” He bit the inside of his lip. “Guess I should get there soon.” Pulling on a sock, Richie stared at the other bare foot like it had done him a personal wrong.  
“Well,” Theo zipped up his bag, walking toward where he sat. Looking deep into Richie’s cobalt eyes, he pushed back his curls. “I’ve really enjoyed meeting you, Richie Tozier.”  
Richie looked up at him sorrowfully, dropping his other sock and standing, he wrapped his arms around Theo and held him so tightly Theo was finding it difficult to draw air, but he didn’t want to tell him to stop.  
“I don’t…” Richie spoke against his neck in a small voice. “I don’t wanna go…”  
Rubbing his back for a moment, Theo gently lowered Richie’s arms, taking his hands in his. He was silent for a long time, staring at the floor. “I may regret saying this,” Theo continued to look at his shoes. “But, you know, a writer can work anywhere…” he looked up into Richie’s eyes, holding his breath.  
It took Richie a moment to register what he was saying. “You would…come with me?”  
Theo took a deep breath and let it out very slowly. “Yes. If you want me.”  
Richie could feel his heart pounding, could hear the sound of his blood whooshing in his ears. Swallowing hard, he nodded. “I want you.”  
Tracing a finger over his jaw, Theo leaned in to kiss him and when he pulled away they were both smiling. “Okay then. It’ll probably take me a few days to get things in order, so I’ll have to meet you somewhere down the line.”  
“Great,” Richie grinned, rubbing his hands over Theo’s waist. Kissing him again, Richie eventually had to stop himself and admit it really was time to get to the airport. Theo offered to drive him to save the hassle of calling a car, and as he pulled into the drop-off lane, Richie looked around cautiously before planting a quick peck on Theo’s lips.  
“See you soon,” his face broke into a tremendous grin.  
“Can’t wait.”


	3. 3

Flopping back on the hotel bed, Richie wiggled his toes in the air, bored. It was around 2:00 p.m. and his show didn’t start for hours. He glanced around the room, picked up the remote to flip through the channels, only to turn it off a couple of minutes later.  _ Nothing fucking good on TV at this hour _ . Patting his belly and frowning, he scooped up his phone from the bedside stand.

_ Hey Theo, what’re you up to?  _

__ Hitting send, Richie waited, grinning when his phone buzzed a couple of minutes later.

Theo:  _ Just making arrangements with my publisher. Nothing special. You? _

__ Richie:  _ Sitting bored in another fucking hotel room doing nothing.  _

__ Theo:  _ Why don’t you go explore? There are a lot of fun things to do in Denver. _

__ Richie:  _ Don’t feel like being around people.  _ His thumbs hesitated over the keyboard.  _ Wish you were here though.  _ Richie pressed send, biting his lip and watching the dots dance as he waited for Theo’s reply.

Theo:  _ What would you do if I were there? _

__ Smirking, Richie ran his tongue over his teeth inside of his mouth. 

Richie:  _ Are you free to call? _

A moment later his phone rang, Theo’s number flashing on the screen. “Hey there,” Richie answered.

“Hello, Richie.” He liked the way Theo said his name. Like he was discovering it anew each time, unearthing something precious and rare, brushing off the dirt and admiring its glittering surface in the sunlight. “So you’re feeling bored, hmm?”

Nodding even though he knew Theo couldn’t see him, Richie responded. “So goddamn bored. Just staring at the beige walls of this fucking room.”

“Hmm…” Richie could picture Theo’s calm, contemplative face. “Perhaps we can do something about that.”

Richie pushed his glasses up his nose. “Oh yeah? What were you thinking?”

“Mmm…” Theo’s deep voice reverberated over the line, sending a spark to the base of Richie’s cock. Richie despised his own voice. He thought he sounded whiny. But Theo had a deep, timbreous sound that seemed to echo from a hidden chamber somewhere in his chest. “I’m thinking about how badly I want you on top of me, Richie.”

Hopping out of the bed for a second, Richie flipped the bar across the hotel room door and double checked the lock before jumping back in. “‘Oh fuck yeah, Theo. You want me on you?” Richie reached down and began palming himself over his boxers.

“Yes, Richie,” breathed Theo. “I like it when you’re grinding on top and I can feel your hard cock rub up against me.”

Stiff, Richie wrapped his fingers around his thick cock. “Shit yeah, you like that? You fucking like when my cock is pressed up on you?”

He heard Theo’s breath quicken. “I do. Let me touch you, Richie. I want to stroke your cock.”

Spitting into his hand, Richie began pulling on himself. “Yeah, you feel so fucking good, Theo.”

Theo let out a soft moan. “Let me suck you, Richie. I want to suck your cock.”

Squeezing his eyes shut, Richie thrust into his own fist. “Fuck, yes, Theo. I love your mouth. You suck me so goddamn good.”

Theo was panting heavily on the other line. “Fuck my face, Richie. Fuck my throat with your big cock.”

Whining, Richie could tell he was getting close, but he stopped his hand. “Wait, wait…” he gasped, lifting his hand away and flexing his fingers to resist the urge to keep tugging. “Flip around. I wanna fucking suck you too. At the same time.”

“Yes, Richie,  _ please _ ,” Theo groaned. “ _ Suck me _ .” The sounds of their ecstasy mounted, one another’s voices spurring them on as their fists flashed, and soon Richie was rocking up and down on the bed. 

“ _ I’m gonna fucking cum, Theo. I’m gonna cum in your fucking throat. Shit! _ ” Arching his back, Richie shot across his t-shirt, attempting to keep the phone to his ear as his body swayed from the force of his passion. 

Chest heaving, Richie readjusted the phone in his hand, body settling. “Mmm...thanks. That was a good distraction.” He giggled a little.

“You’re welcome.” He could hear the smile in Theo’s voice. “Though of course, I’d prefer the real thing.”

“Me too.” Richie nodded.

“I miss you, Richie.” 

Hesitating, Richie tightened his grip around the phone and bit his lip. Theo was silent on the other end, and he could imagine his serene, almost frustratingly patient face staring back at him, awaiting a response.

”I miss you, too,” he murmured in a small voice, picking at the drying cum on his shirt and peering once again around the desolate hotel room. “I...I want you here with me.”

“It shouldn’t be much longer,” Theo replied. “I just need to get a couple of household things in order, then I’ll come meet you wherever you are.”

Richie grinned. “Okay. Looking forward to it.” They made their goodbyes and Richie took off his glasses, letting them clatter onto the beside stand before grabbing a pillow, hugging it to his chest and falling asleep.

**

The day arrived and Richie found himself almost literally bouncing off the walls as he paced around the El Paso hotel room; drumming his legs, bopping his head, pausing to jump up and down, and occasionally just shaking his whole damn body like a dog trying to dry off after a bath.

Finally he heard a knock at the door and he crossed the room in two giant strides, throwing it open to reveal Theo, smiling with a large fashionable rolling suitcase at his side and an attaché case slung across his chest.

Snatching the front of his vest, Richie dragged him into a tight hug, swaying them back and forth

“ _ Whoa _ , hello, Richie,” Theo chuckled, encircling him in his arms as well. Tucking his head against him, Theo breathed deep. He smelled a little bit different than he remembered, and Theo supposed it was because Richie used whatever shampoo and body wash each hotel provided, but underneath there was something else; the scent that was just him, just Richie, his skin, and as Theo pushed his nose into his neck and inhaled he grew intoxicated. 

Parting, Theo wheeled his luggage into the room and closed the door behind him. “So how was your flight?” Richie asked, goofy smile plastered across his face.

“Oh, not bad.” Theo sighed, rolling his shoulders. “LA to El Paso isn’t much of a trip.”

Approaching him and placing his sizable hands at Theo’s waist, Richie leaned down to put their foreheads together. “Still think you should’ve let me get you from the airport. I got a fucking rental after all.”

“I didn’t want to be a bother.” Reaching up, Theo caressed the stubble of Richie’s handsome face, smiling.

Richie grinned. “Oh, you don’t want to bother me, huh?” Leaning forward, he pressed their hips together, backing Theo against the small table in the corner of the room and brushing the briefest of kisses to his lips. Theo shook his head. “No? Maybe I should fucking bother you a little bit…”

Grasping Theo, Richie lifted him onto the table, catching his mouth and twirling their tongues together as he kneaded his ass. Theo peeled off Richie’s shirt instantly, aching for more of his skin, trailing his fingers over his firm chest and the dark hair that resided there. 

Palming Theo’s crotch, Richie could feel the hard column of his erection through his slacks and was grateful when Theo scrambled to undo his jeans, sliding his hand inside and humming against Richie’s mouth when his fingers grasped his thick cock and began pumping. Richie managed to get Theo’s vest off and his eyebrows were gathered in frustration at the many buttons of his shirt while Theo kissed his neck, dragging his teeth over the sensitive skin below his ear and nipping his tiny joined earlobe while his hand sped up around Richie’s cock. Finally freeing him of his shirt, Richie pushed it from his shoulders, Theo tearing it off the rest of the way while Richie dove down to lick, kiss and bite his chest, hips rocking forward eagerly.

“Fuck this,” Richie said breathlessly, and scooping Theo up in his brawny arms, he hauled him to the bed, tossing him in before stepping out of his jeans and boxers while Theo leaned back to remove his, for once not caring as they fell in a puddle to the floor. 

Climbing on top of him, Richie flicked his glasses onto the bedside stand and clamped his hand around Theo’s cock, stroking intently as he ground against his thigh. Tongue playing into Theo’s mouth, Richie caressed his face before breaking away and kissing his way down his body, lips tracing the pathway of his fingers before resting between his legs. Taking Theo into his mouth, Richie began to suck.

Last time, Theo assumed Richie’s technique was due to his nerves about going down sober for the first time. But now he had no choice but to come to the conclusion that Richie liked his blowjobs...sloppy.  _ I guess I shouldn’t be surprised after watching him eat…  _ For one thing, his mouth was so  _ wide.  _ Theo was well-endowed, perhaps not compared to Richie, but he was a more compact man after all, and still Richie absolutely inhaled his cock, taking him down his throat with apparent ease, drooling like a stroke victim, using his hands from time to time, but preferring to keep Theo lodged in the back of his throat and use his tongue and undulating muscles to pleasure him. It was a unique approach. And Theo wasn’t complaining.

“ _ Fuck,  _ Richie, yes!” Theo gasped. “But wait, wait,” he tapped his shoulder, and Richie rose, looking disappointed.

Frowning down at Theo’s cock, he looked up at him, eyes sad. “Did I fuck it up?” 

“Oh, Richie,  _ no, _ ” he stroked Richie’s prominent cheekbone. “You’re amazing. I just want to suck you at the same time. Come on.” Theo patted the bed next to him and Richie grinned, scooting his hips up near Theo’s head, they adjusted themselves.

Taking Theo back into his mouth, Richie sank down, tongue flipping back and forth over his shaft as he bobbed, holding onto Theo’s ass to keep him firmly sheathed and moaning around his cock. He loved the noises Theo made when he got excited, the deep, guttural grunts, the occasional out of character high pitched whimper. It made Richie want to fuck him in every way imaginable so he could hear him scream his name.

For Theo, giving head was akin to performing surgery. Following a set of standardized steps and procedures to achieve the desired results, Theo wrapped his lips around Richie’s substantial cock, sucking, stroking, and expertly working his tongue in tandem with one another. Deciding to risk it, he used three fingers of his free hand and began massaging slow, small circles into the space between Richie’s balls and his entrance. Richie began thrusting into his face more forcefully, one of his massive palms coming up to slap against the back of his head and push Theo down on his cock. Theo moaned around him, partially because what Richie was doing between his legs was heavenly, but also because when Richie lost control like this, actions reckless as he desperately sought release inside Theo, whining and writhing, Richie’s insistent passion drove him mad.

Getting close, Richie was gasping with Theo’s cock half in his mouth. Whatever his fingers were doing, digging deep into that sensitive spot, was overwhelming and Richie found himself nearly on top of Theo’s face as he came, crying hopeless whimpers as he rolled back and forth, hot cum painting the back of Theo’s throat.

Recovering slightly, Richie held Theo’s hips still and took him down his throat, sucking intensely until Theo’s hand was gripping his thigh, moaning.

“ _ Richie. Richie, fuck, you’re gonna make me cum _ ,” he cried, nails digging into Richie’s skin as he tasted Theo’s release, swallowing and slowing, delicately massaging his ass as he dislodged himself. 

Flipping around, Richie’s curls tumbled as he laid a head on the pillow opposite Theo, who glided his hand over Richie’s brow, down the line of his neck, playing across his broad shoulder. 

“Fuck, I’m glad you’re here.” Richie’s wonky smile looked at him sideways and Theo couldn’t help but grin in return.

“Me too, Richie.”

Taking a quick shower together, they got in Richie’s red convertible to head to the club. Shifting gears, Richie was pushing 50 in a 30 zone and Theo looked over at him in alarm, but chose to say nothing, arm holding tight to the door for support. Swinging into a parking place half a block away, Richie put up the top and locked the car before they walked to the Comic Strip. 

Fidgeting, Richie greeted the manager, who offered to bring him backstage. He was headlining, but there were two other comics doing shorter sets before he went on.

“Break a leg, Richie,” Theo smiled at him.

Nodding, Richie thanked him and disappeared. Making his way to the bar, Theo waved in acknowledgment when he saw a youngish, thin blond man he recognized from a handful of years ago.

“Hello Caleb, how are you?” Theo took a stool across from him.

The bartender’s mouth dropped open. “Why  _ Theo Thomas _ , I do declare! It’s been years. How you doin’, honey?” Never considering himself the most low-key queer, Caleb put Theo to shame, his flame burning bright for the whole world to see. 

“I’m doing pretty well, Caleb. How have you been?” Theo nodded,

Flipping a hand towel over his shoulder dramatically, he sighed. “Well, aside from the fact that I live in  _ El Paso  _ and serve drinks in a fucking  _ comedy club. _ ” Caleb drawled in his heavy accent, rolling his eyes. “I’m doing fine.” His eyes trailed to the door that led backstage. “That fellow you came in with. You and he…?” Caleb raised his eyebrows and did a little shimmy.

Smiling, Theo shook his head. “No, he’s just a friend.” It wasn’t his place to out anyone, and he knew Richie wasn’t ready for people to know.

Caleb eyed him closely. “Hmm. Too bad. He’s kinda cute.” He shrugged. “Looks like he might be rough trade, too.”

Theo had to swallow a laugh.  _ Well, he’s not entirely wrong… _

Ordering a drink, Theo caught up with Caleb for a bit before taking a seat in the front row. The opener was pretty solid. A bit green, maybe, but he was developing an original voice and his comedy was quick and intelligent. Then the second guy strolled onstage, scratching a belly that hung over his jeans and smirking at the audience.

“You guys ever notice,” he began. “That gay dudes always cover their mouths when they laugh?” He pretended to giggle coquettishly, holding his fingers to his lips, and flicking his wrist limply afterwards. “You know why that is? So you can’t smell the cum on their breath.” 

Audience laughing, Theo dug his fingers into the arm of the chair. The rest of his set was much the same. Going after feminism, race, even making a rape joke that got boos, but still he persisted. Theo had seen many of these ‘shock and awe’ comedians over the years. Always the same entitled white guys who were too lazy to work on their craft, so instead they slapped a crowd across the face with crass. Sure, Richie was filthy. He talked about sex and relied heavily on gross-out humor. But his jokes didn’t hurt anybody and Theo respected him for that.

The repugnant man left the stage and Richie walked on. Theo felt he could finally breathe as he watched his beautiful man pacing back and forth, slipping in and out of his silly voices and cracking jokes with impeccable timing.

Show ending, Theo met Richie at the backstage entrance and waited off to the side while he signed autographs and took pictures. After, they went to the bar and, much to his chagrin, were joined by the other two comedians. The first fellow, Tommy, was pleasant and engaging. It turned out he was a fan of Theo’s work and asked him about the next installment of the series, which was flattering.

The second comedian, however, Tyler, continued his spiel offstage. 

“What can I get you fine fellas?” Caleb asked as he approached the four of them. Giving their orders, Caleb sped away to mix their drinks and Tyler leaned in conspiratorially.

“Looks like he wants a stiff dick in his ass instead of a stiff drink, am I right?” Tyler smirked. Tommy laughed. And so did Richie. Theo folded his hands, looking away. Returning, Caleb passed around their drinks and Richie tossed back two fingers of bourbon like it was nothing, tapping the counter for another.

They talked comedy and crowds, Theo doing his best to ignore Tyler’s repellent comments, but when Richie threw back his third double bourbon and asked Caleb for a fourth, Theo placed a hand on his arm.

“Are you sure, Richie?” He said softly so the others wouldn’t hear. “Don’t you think you’ve had enough?”

Richie looked down at his hand, then into Theo’s eyes and gave the slightest of head shakes, eyes burning with rage. Retracting his fingers, Theo turned away, face hot. Not contributing much to the rest of the conversation, he waited while Richie said goodbye and stumbled out of the club after two more drinks, fishing in his pocket for the keys.

”Don’t you dare think you’re driving, Richie.” Theo snatched them from his hand, jaw clenched. 

Richie just nodded, struggling to bring his surroundings into focus as he climbed into the passenger seat. Reaching across, Theo buckled him in and drove back to the hotel at a much more modest speed than they arrived. 

Pulling into the parking lot, Theo walked around the car and helped Richie out of his seat, lifting his arm around his shoulder and guiding him to the room. When they got inside, Richie smashed his face against Theo, tongue sliding along the outside of his mouth. Theo pushed him away.

“No, Richie.”

Struggling to bring him into focus, Richie swayed on the spot, his arms hanging in front of him. “The fuck? Why not?”

”I have no interest in having sex with a drunk person.” Theo shook his head.

Richie’s nose flared and his eyes blinked angrily as he pressed Theo back against the door. “But I wanna fuck.”

Hands at his shoulders, Theo pushed him back and deliberately shook his head. “I said no, Richie.”

Something seemed to slide into place and Richie nodded. Theo led him to the bed and Richie flopped down. Helping him turn over, Theo got him undressed down to his boxers, removed his glasses, and pulled the blankets up to his shoulders. Carefully folding his own clothes, Theo crawled in next to him and Richie thrashed, throwing an arm and a leg across him. Uncomfortable, Theo managed to fall asleep eventually, Richie’s heavy snores filling the darkness.

**

Blinking awake, Richie wiped the drool from his face, turning over the pillow so the wet spot was away from him. Peering around the room with one eye, he didn’t see Theo, and he scooped up his glasses and shoved them on his nose. Getting up to use the bathroom, he emerged to see Theo coming into the room with a paper plate loaded with eggs, sausage, and toast from the continental breakfast.

“Oh, you’re awake.” He didn’t meet Richie’s gaze, but sat at the small hotel table and began to eat. “They’re still serving for another half hour or so if you want to get something.” Theo spoke to the table, scooping up another forkful of egg. 

Richie looked at him and rubbed his face. “So you’re just not gonna fucking talk to me then, is that how this works?”

Setting down his plastic fork, Theo carefully took his napkin from his collar and wiped his fingers clean before setting it on the table and turning to face Richie.

“Do you really think those kinds of jokes are funny, Richie?” He narrowed his eyes at him.

Confused, Richie tilted his head. “What?”

“The jokes that man Tyler was telling last night.” Theo leaned back in his chair. “The jokes about gay people. And everything else, for that matter. You think that kind of thing is funny?”

Shifting his weight, Richie shrugged. “They’re just jokes…”

“No, Richie,” Theo shook his head. “They’re not. People laugh at those jokes and then they think it’s okay to laugh at gay people. People like us.” He looked at him hard and Richie felt his face growing warm. “And sometimes people who think it’s okay to laugh, think it’s okay to do a whole hell of a lot worse.”

Looking away, Richie rubbed his arm. “I’m sorry. I didn’t...I didn’t think about it.”

Nodding, Theo leaned forward, elbows on his knees and folded his hands. “Look, Richie. I’ll never pressure you to come out, okay? That’s your business and if you want to stay in the closet for the rest of your life, fine. Though frankly, I don’t recommend it because it can be a miserable existence.” Richie swallowed hard as Theo continued. “But I won’t sit back while you laugh at homophobic bullshit and then try to come back here and fuck me in secret. That’s where I draw the line.”

Theo’s eyes bore holes into Richie. He found he had to look away. “But what if, um...what if I’m around someone like that and they say something and I...I try calling them on it,” Richie held out his hands, chewing on his lip. “What if they assume I’m gay? I mean, you know what these guys can be like…”

“Richie, you don’t have to be gay to stand up to a bigot. You have to be human.” Theo stated simply.

Richie nodded slowly. “Okay.” He chewed his lip. “I’m really sorry.” Timidly Richie stepped forward and extended his hand, which Theo accepted. 

“I know this isn’t easy for you, Richie. And I’m here to help you work through it.” He smiled. “Just keep trying, okay?”

Grinning, Richie brushed Theo’s hair away from his face. “I will.”

  
  
  



	4. 4

Springing for a suite, Richie laid his head back on the rim of the tub in the Oklahoma City hotel room, a deep sigh escaping him as he set his glasses on the tile and the whirlpool jets swirled around them. Theo tucked in, Richie draped one strong arm around him, dark hair plastered to his chest as beads of sweat started to gather at his forehead.

“This is nice.” He purred, settling against the jet hitting his lower back. Nodding, Theo pressed a kiss to Richie’s angular jaw, dipping his hands into the water before dragging his fingers through his hair.

“How are you feeling about tonight’s show?” Theo saw some of the tension return to Richie’s shoulders as he blinked and stared at the ceiling. 

“Well,” he puffed out his cheeks. “Last year when I was here, I fucking bombed like a kamikaze pilot, so to be honest, not thrilled.” Richie shook his head. 

Theo combed through his dark curls. “I’m sure you’ll be great.” Giving him half a grin, Richie turned to him and Theo traced his lower lip before leaning forward and catching his mouth. Wet hands gripped slippery flesh as they sunk into one another, Theo straddling Richie and slipping a hand between them to begin pumping his massive erection. Richie gripped Theo’s ass, dragging him close as he licked into his mouth frantically, mewling. 

Thankfully Theo had the foresight to set the lube and a condom on the edge of the tub. Unwrapping it, he found it surprisingly challenging to slide the condom over Richie’s thick cock underwater, but eventually he managed. Standing and dripping, Theo lubed himself, sticking a couple of sticky fingers inside for a second before crouching over Richie, feet balanced on the step of the tub, hanging onto his broad shoulders for balance. Richie centered himself at Theo’s entrance and with a gasp, Theo sank down on his cock, biting his lip and holding still, until his body relaxed slightly.

Rising, Theo began to gently rock Richie into himself, Richie’s big hands on his hips as he started to thrust. Dipping forward, he slid kisses over Theo’s wet skin, biting his neck and pulling at the paper thin skin of his collarbone with his sharp teeth. Fingers of one large hand wrapping around Theo’s cock, Richie began jerking him in time with his rolling hips, other hand holding the small of his back and encouraging Theo to lean back so he could better hit his prostate.

Pushing his feet against the tile step, Theo rammed himself down onto Richie’s cock, moaning recklessly.

“ _Richie, fuck, yes Richie!_ ” He cried, fingers scrambling to caress Richie’s beautiful face as his orgasm ripped through him, cum shooting in rivulets and floating on the surface of the water. 

Once Theo was finished, Richie dropped his grip on his cock, firm arms practically smothering him as Richie held Theo firm and pounded up into him, whimpering against his ear.

“ _Theo, I love fucking you, baby._ ” Richie’s lips were hot and insistent against his ear and Theo felt a significant tug in his gut at the term of endearment, fisting his hands in Richie’s damp curls and kissing every inch of his face he could reach as Richie came, shuddering and digging his nails into Theo’s back.

Exchanging laguid kisses, Theo could taste the bit of salt from the sweat gathered on Richie’s upper lip and before dismounting he examined his face for a long time, looking so vulnerable and open there in the bubbling water without his glasses.

Joining him on the step, Richie draped an arm around Theo and brushed a kiss against his temple. They sat in companionable silence for a while before Richie jostled his shoulder.

“Hey.”

Theo tipped his head up to look at him. “Hmm?”

“What, um…” Richie’s eyes shifted. “What’s it like?”

Theo narrowed his eyes. “What’s _what_ like?”

“You know…” holding out his thumb, Richie lifted it in the air. “Taking it up the ass.”

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Theo chuckled. “Nice, Richie. Very romantic way of putting it.” 

“Sorry.” Richie smirked. “I mean...doesn’t it...hurt?”

Theo shrugged, facing him. “Yeah, a little. You get used to it. And if you’re doing it right, the pleasure outweighs the pain by an astronomical factor, so it’s worth it.” Nodding, Richie stared off into the middle distance. Theo scanned his face. “Would you like to try it sometime?”

Richie turned to him with the expression of a teen who’d just been caught looking at a Playboy. “No, no,” he shook his head. “I mean, what we do is fine. It’s great. I don’t think I need to try that.” Shifting, Richie swallowed and Theo saw the muscles of his jaw pop as he clenched his teeth.

Carefully Theo took one of Richie’s hands, tracing small patterns on it, leaving behind trails of dew as he went. “You know, Richie, wanting to feel pleasure doesn’t make you any less of a man.” Theo spoke in a soft, measured voice. “In fact, admitting you want something, or need something,” glancing up, Theo met Richie’s soulful blue eyes. “Just makes you stronger.”

Placing a hand on top of his, Richie was silent for a moment before clearing his throat. “Maybe, I’ll, um...think it over.” He nodded a little.

Theo brushed back his tumbling hair. “Alright. No pressure. But if it ever is something you want to try…” he leaned in, nipping at Richie’s tiny joined earlobe. “ _I would absolutely love to fuck you._ ” Richie shivered. Theo kissed him briefly before they stood, toweling off and getting ready.

***

Before one of Richie’s shows at Club 337 in Louisiana, Theo and Richie stood before the bathroom mirror rushing to get ready after a shower that was meant to be brief, but resulted in them both dropping to their knees under the cascading water.

“Louisiana has some of the worst hecklers I’ve ever seen.” Theo shook his head, applying toothpaste to his brush. “We had one guy who just yelled non-stop from the moment the comics walked on. And management did nothing. Said it drew a crowd and crowds meant more liquor sales.” Rolling his eyes, Theo began to brush his teeth.

Richie shook his head, then he looked at Theo curiously. “Hey, so your husband?”

Theo spit. “Martin.”

“Yeah, right, Martin.” Richie nodded. “Sorry to ask, but, um...how did he die?”

Rinsing, Theo continued looking in the mirror. “He killed himself.”

Toothbrush clattering onto the counter, Richie stared at Theo, mouth agape. Theo had tossed the sentence away like it was nothing, and was now wiping his mouth before running his fingers through his hair.

“Jesus fucking _Christ_ , Theo,” reaching forward, Richie turned him by the shoulder to face him. “Why didn’t you fucking tell me that?”

Shrugging, Theo faced the mirror again. “You never asked.”

Raising his eyebrows, Richie spread his hands in bewilderment, face agog. “But Theo, you can’t...you can’t just _hide_ that kind of shit.” He shook his head in disbelief.

Theo’s neck swiveled, green eyes leveling him, mouth a flat, hard line. “I don’t think you’re in any position to lecture me about hiding things, Richie.”

Swallowing, Richie looked away, face hot as Theo strode out of the bathroom. After brushing his teeth, Richie tentatively approached him as Theo was buttoning up his shirt. 

Delicately he rested a hand on Theo’s shoulder. “I’m really sorry about Martin. It must’ve been hard to lose him like that.” 

Theo let out a deep sigh. “Yes. I…” he quietly fidgeted with the tie in his hands for a while before responding. “There were many days I didn’t think I would make it. After that happened.”

Wrapping his arms around him, Richie kissed Theo’s forehead. “I’m so glad you did.” Theo clung to him, breathing in Richie’s scent in the comforting circle of his arms.

Strolling into Club 337, Richie had over an hour to kill when the proprietor, a towering wall of a man by the name of Bruce, grunted down at him.“Early.” His lips barely moved as he spoke.

Nodding, Richie shrugged. “Yeah. Guess so.” Theo stood off to his side, peering around. The place hadn’t changed in the handful of years since he’d been there and the sights and smells were bringing back memories, both joyous and painful.

Pointing with one meaty hand, Bruce told Richie he was free to wait in the dressing room or at the bar. “Your buddy can go, too.” Theo followed Richie to the dressing room. Well, calling it a room was generous. It was an open seating area behind the stage with a couch, table, and some refreshments, but they flopped down anyway, sighing.

“So when did you start stand-up, anyway?” Theo asked, tapping on the lid of a soda before cracking it open.

Richie’s foot jiggled in the air as one leg crossed the other. “Oh, right after high school. Got up on a stage in a dive in Maine. Fucking bombed hardcore.” He giggled a little.

Theo smiled. “But you didn’t let that scare you away.”

“Nope,” Richie shook his head, untwisting a bottle of water. “Took a friend’s car one weekend and went to an open mic in New York. That went a lot better.” He nodded, throwing back half of the bottle. Theo found himself watching the progress of Richie’s Adam’s apple, wondering if there was any aspect of his body he wouldn’t find erotic. 

“I’m glad you didn’t give up, Richie. You’re very talented.”

“Thanks.” Richie gave Theo’s hand a brief squeeze. “I mean, basically you have to be willing to fail. And then fucking fail better.” Richie shrugged, reaching for a hand of trail mix and mashing it in his wide mouth, looking around at the jade walls, oblivious to the profundity of his statement.

Grinning, Theo tugged lightly on his sleeve. “Well, I’m really proud of you, Richie. You’ve worked hard and look where you are now. You deserve it. You deserve a lot of good things.”

Facing him, Richie raised an eyebrow, glancing Theo up and down. “Oh yeah?”

”Yeah, of course, Richie.”

Leaning in, Richie invaded Theo’s space, his smell surrounding him, nose almost grazing his cheek. “ _Are you going to give them to me?_ ” Richie’s voice was throaty, dark. It made Theo tingle as he felt Richie’s warm exhale on his neck.

“Time.” Whipping apart, they saw the massive figure of Bruce standing about ten feet away, face expressionless. He stared at them dead-eyed for a moment before turning and schlumping in the direction of the lobby.

Bending forward, elbows on his knees, Richie removed his glasses and ran a hand over his face. “Fuck.”

Theo was silent. He wanted to reach out to comfort him, but figured touching him now wasn’t the best choice. “Richie,” he said after a couple of minutes. “I don’t...he didn’t seem too fazed by it.”

Blinking and nodding, Richie didn’t say anything, but stood and smoothed his hands over his jacket. “Alright, well,” he shook the nerves from his hands. “Better get out there.”

“You’re going to be great, Richie.” Theo smiled, but Richie was chewing the inside of his cheek. 

“Thanks.” He didn’t meet Theo’s eye before proceeding to the stage.

Thankfully Richie slaughtered the show. The combination of an engaged crowd and Richie’s anxious energy produced a bombastic performance, and Theo wished he’d been recording for posterity’s sake. When Richie jumped off the stage, he was elated, any heaviness from before evaporated in the heat of his set. 

Clapping Theo on the back, Richie led him outside and they found a quaint seafood place where Richie had Theo laughing so uproariously with voices, bits, and ridiculous faces it took him twice as long as usual to finish his meal, meaning of course that Richie was waiting forever as he’d gulped his own plate down in a flash. But Richie didn’t mind. Watching Theo cackle, cheeks apple red, tears in his eyes as he fought for breath, brought him intense joy and he reveled in his ability to coax Theo to heights of hilarity.

Door closing behind them at the hotel room, Richie’s large hands covered both sides of Theo’s face as he kissed him, tongue sliding inside to wrestle and humming against his lips. Whenever Richie kissed him like this, Theo felt like he couldn’t get his clothing off fast enough, couldn’t never get to Richie’s touch with enough haste.

Collapsing naked on the bed, they rolled together, hands scrounging for every inch of flesh as their erections greeted one another in passing. Theo managed to grip Richie’s cock in the frenzy, pulling on him excitedly for a moment before Richie took hold of his wrist and leaned away from their kiss.

“Hey, um…” Richie’s cobalt blue eyes looked into his, chewing on his lip. “I’ve been thinking about it and...I think I want you to.”

“Want me to what?” Theo breathed, wiping his forehead.

Looking at Theo’s chest, he played with his sparse light brown hair. “To fuck me.” Richie said in a tiny voice, lips barely moving.

Theo tenderly pushed back Richie’s almost black tendrils. “Okay. I’d love to.” He smiled.

“Just, um…” Richie scrunched his brow, fingers continuing to draw on his chest. “You’ll...you’ll go slow, right?”

“Of course, Richie,” Theo traced his jaw. “And if at any point you want me to stop, or do something differently, you just let me know, okay?” 

Richie nodded and smiled. Grabbing the lube and a condom off the bedside stand, Theo set them on the mattress for later before pressing Richie back. Laying down on top of him, Theo looked into his eyes, playing with his hair before delicately touching their lips together. Theo took his time, intending to worship every part of Richie’s gorgeous body. Kissing Richie, caressing him, licking and nipping, working slowly and steadily over him until Richie’s shaking was no longer from nerves but from desire.

Kneeling in between Richie’s spread legs, Theo picked up the lube, and squeezed one of Richie’s thick thighs. “Are you ready for me to use my fingers?”

Lifting his head, Richie nodded. “Y-yeah. Okay.”

“I’ll just do one at first.” Theo reassured him, applying lube to his hand. Encouraging Richie to spread his legs a little wider, Theo began circling the tense muscle, generously slathering it with the lubricant. “Ready?” Looking up again, Richie gave a little nod and Theo slid a finger inside. At first for Richie the sensation was...odd, though not unpleasant. He’d done it himself before, sure, but having someone else do it was another matter entirely. But then Theo curved his finger inside of him, flicking it, and Richie gasped, muscles jumping and his mouth fell open.

“ _Fuck._ ” 

Theo smiled and did it again. And again, until he saw Richie’s eyes shut tight and his hips tilt ever-so-slightly to meet his movements.”Do you want more?” Theo dropped his voice dangerously low, at the same time using his free hand to ghost his fingers over Richie’s cock, which was straining up to his navel, so painfully erect it was almost purple.

“Fuck yeah.” Richie nodded enthusiastically. Smirking, Theo met his finger with a second, beginning to pulse inside Richie with a gentle rhythm, thumb of his other hand rubbing against the frenulum of his cock with a delicacy that drove Richie mad, anxious for Theo to tug him wildly and finish it.

It wasn’t long before Richie was digging his heels into the mattress, hands fisted into the sheets as high moans escaped him, driving his hips down in a desperate attempt to fuck himself on Theo’s fingers.

Thrashing his head back and forth, Richie was fed up. “Jesus fucking Christ, Theo. Just fuck me. _Fuck me._ I need you to fuck me. _Now._ Just—“ Arching his back, Richie whined helplessly, pounding his fists into the mattress in a full blown tantrum.

“Okay, Richie. I will.” Theo responded calmly, applying the condom and lube to himself before smearing more over Richie. Lining himself up and placing Richie’s legs at his shoulders, Theo looked to his flushed face, his eyes were shut tight, head straining back against the pillow.

“ _Richie, look at me_.” Theo whispered. Blinking his eyes open, Richie saw Theo’s serene face, which dipped down to give him a drawn, passionate kiss before repositioning himself. “Are you ready?”

“Yeah.” Richie nodded, swallowing. Theo brushed a kiss over his calve before pressing forward. Mouth falling open, Richie’s hands scrambled at the sheets and an unbidden squeak came out of him as he felt the sting of the stretch. Theo stopped almost immediately, wanting to give Richie as much time as he needed to acclimate to the sensation. Richie was taking short, shallow breaths, eyes clenched and shoulders tight.

“Richie,” Theo slid his hand up his abdomen. “Breathe, honey. Breathe into my hand, Relax and breathe.” Laying back, Richie did his best to focus on the weight of Theo’s fingers on his belly, making them rise and fall. Eventually Theo felt his body loosen around his cock. 

“Good,” applying some lube, he took Richie’s cock in hand, beginning to pull him lightly. “Do you want me to keep going?”

Richie took a deep breath. “Yeah.” Tipping forward, Theo sank in maybe another inch before pausing again, using his hand to titillate the sensitive head of Richie’s cock, watching as he licked his pink lips. “ _More_.” Richie breathed. Surging forth, Theo watched as Richie extended his elegant neck, back arching slightly, ankles crossing behind Theo’s head. “ _Fuck, Theo. More._ ”

Sheathing himself completely, Theo rubbed his cheek against Richie’s leg, the pressure of his tight body around him divine. “Are you ready for me to move, Richie?” Theo attempted to sound composed, but his ragged voice betrayed him. The desire to thrust into Richie was overwhelming.

“Yes, Fuck me. _Fuck me._ ” Richie demanded and Theo gladly obeyed, hips retreating slightly before joining Richie again. Jerking Richie’s thick cock in time with their cascading bodies, Theo angled his hips upwards and soon every clap of their flesh was followed by a high whimper from Richie as he hit his prostate, Richie’s legs tightened around Theo’s neck as he attempted to rush to orgasm, forcing Theo’s head down.

“ _Fuck, yeah, fuck me! Just like that, FUCK!_ ” Theo had never heard Richie scream like that, voice cracking and strangled, followed by a waterfall of melodious broken moans, cum shooting across his chest and body straining around Theo’s cock. 

Richie’s beauty was ethereal, white skin flushed a high pink, black ringlets plastered over his face, which was turned to the side, panting open mouthed through his curvaceous lips. Spent cock half hard, the evidence of his ecstasy dotting his abdomen with his strong arms limp at his sides.

Seeing Richie that way was too much, a few more irregular thrusts and Theo came, clutching Richie’s legs and gasping his name.

Shaky, Theo started to withdraw, but Richie’s long arms came up like a squid dragging him down to the depths of the sea, pulling his chest to his own and wrapping his legs around Theo’s hips. Richie rocked them together for a moment, before kissing Theo’s forehead and releasing him. Smiling, Theo got up to throw the condom away in the bathroom. 

When he returned, Richie was curled up facing the wall. Figuring he was tired, Theo crawled in behind him, throwing an arm over him and kissing the back of Richie’s neck. It wasn’t until a couple of minutes later, nearly adrift on slumber, that Theo heard a sniffle and blinked, suddenly alert.

“Richie?” He sat up, taking him by the shoulder and rolling him over. Eyes red, Richie was attempting to wipe away the wetness on his face with the sheet.

“I’m sorry,” Richie’s voice was thick. “I don’t know why I’m crying.”

Theo rested his chin on Richie’s shoulder, rubbing his chest. “Well, it’s a very vulnerable thing, what you just did. What we did.” He tucked Richie’s hair behind his ear. “It makes sense you’d be feeling a little fragile right now.”

Richie laid a hand on top of his own. “So you don’t think I’m being stupid?” He sniffed.

“Oh no, of course not.” Theo caressed his face. “I…” Hesitating, Theo decided not to say what he really wanted to. “I care about you and I hope you enjoyed it.”

“Enjoyed it?” Richie ran a hand over his scruffy smile. “That was fucking great.” He giggled and Theo joined in before kissing him once more.

***

Richie’s second night of shows in Louisiana went almost as well as the first, and by the third night, even though Theo could recite his act at this point, he was giddy with anticipation when he took the stage. 

But Richie was only about a quarter of the way through his set when a college-aged guy about three rows back made a megaphone with his hands and yelled, “Hey faggot, how about telling some _real_ jokes?” Looking self-satisfied and crossing his arms.

Theo watched Richie falter, mouth hanging open for a second, microphone trembling, a far away look in his eyes. But he recovered quickly, choosing to ignore the heckler and proceeding with the set as planned. Thankfully the man didn’t speak up again, but Theo spent the rest of the show digging his fingernails into the seat in anticipation, half-hoping for an excuse to rage against him.

Richie walked off the stage and Theo could see the dejected weight on his shoulders. “Richie, you can’t listen to assholes like that, they’re just—“

“I need a fucking drink.” His voice had a rod of steel underneath it that made Theo nervous.

Looking around, Theo saw there wasn’t anyone nearby so he reached for his elbow. “Why don’t we just go back to the hotel and—“

“I said,” Richie ripped his arm out of Theo’s grip, eyes the color of an oncoming storm as he stared him down. “I need. A fucking. Drink. And I’m going to get one. Whether you come with or not is your goddamn choice.” Richie strode to the bar, holding up two fingers. 

Swallowing hard, Theo turned to follow him. He sat silently while Richie tossed back a double bourbon. And another. And another. Richie soaked in the burn, grateful when the world went wavy and that gritty feeling of shame turned instead to a humming that radiated over his numb skin. At some point Theo suggested they go back to the hotel again, but he swatted him away like an annoying fly, ordering more liquor and drinking it down effortlessly. 

When he couldn’t remember why he was upset, Richie stopped tapping the bar for refills, fishing in his jeans for his wallet, overbalancing, and falling to the floor. Theo’s steady arms righted him.

“Gotta pay,” Richie slurred, confused as to why it seemed difficult to get his wallet out of his pocket.

Leading him slowly around corners, Theo put one of Richie’s arms around his own shoulders to better guide the taller man around. “I took care of it Richie, don’t worry about it.”

Richie nodded and the whole world bounced in a way that was vaguely amusing, but also disorienting. Suddenly he was leaning against Theo in front of the hotel room as he attempted to balance Richie on one side while using the keycard to open the door, unaware of how they got there from outside of the club.

Making it inside, Theo flopped him down on the bed and began removing Richie’s clothes. Drastically misreading the situation, Richie began pawing at him ineffectually, fingers swiping at Theo as he got Richie down to his boxers. 

Removing Richie’s glasses and covering him up, Theo sat in a chair and waited. He’d learned by now that if he slipped into bed next to Richie when he was this drunk and still awake, he would get trapped under his immobile limbs, so he patiently waited for him to pass out, which after the amount of bourbon he had tonight, shouldn’t take long.

Shifting, Richie’s mouth was hanging open and Theo thought it was only a matter of time before he fell asleep, when he heard his gruff, slurred voice. “How do they know, Theo?”

“What’s that, Richie?” Theo knew engaging in a conversation with him at this point was foolish, but he didn’t have anything better to do either.

Richie’s eyes blinked open. “He called me a faggot.” Swallowing, Richie brought a shaky hand up to his face. “How do they always know?” His voice was thick as Richie curled onto his side, body wracked with sobs.

Rushing over to him, Theo cradled him in his arms, Richie clinging to him. “Bowers knew, too! Everybody! How? _How?_ ” Theo didn’t know who Bowers was, but Richie was crying with such intensity a large wet spot was growing on his vest and he was concerned he might start hyperventilating. Rocking him gently, Theo combed his fingers through Richie’s hair. 

He knew any flowery words, any impassioned speech, would be forgotten in the morning, so Theo just pressed his lips to Richie’s forehead and whispered, “ _I’m here. I’m right here._ ” Repeating it like a mantra until Richie cried himself dry, sniffling and drooling. Laying him back against the pillow, Theo covered him up, undressing himself and climbing in beside him, grateful Richie wasn’t awake to see his own tears.

***

Nearly noon by the time Richie woke up, Theo was reading in the corner as he stumbled to the bathroom. 

“Morning.” Richie looked at him with one eye when he emerged, picking up his glasses. Theo nodded, turning a page and not looking up. _Great, the silent treatment._ Though Richie’s head was hammering with a hangover, so he wasn’t much in the mood for talking anyway. Drinking some water and jumping in the shower in an effort to bring himself back to normality, Richie pulled on a fresh t-shirt and jeans, approaching Theo with his arms crossed.

“So you wanna go get some breakfast?”

Theo flipped another page. “It’s lunch time, Richie.”

Rolling his eyes, Richie threw up a hand. “Fine, lunch then. Want to?”

Theo turned the page, picked up his bookmark, placing it delicately inside the volume before closing it and setting it flush with the edge of the table. Sometimes Richie found Theo’s slow, deliberate movements endearing. Right now they were pissing him off.

Folding his hands, Theo looked up at him. “Richie, I think we need to discuss your drinking.”

Richie scoffed, turning to the side and shaking his head. “What?”

“I think you have a problem, Richie.” Unmoving, Theo stared at him unblinking. Those accusing eyes were putting Richie off-balance and he didn’t appreciate it.

“So I like to have a couple of drinks, so what?” Richie shrugged, holding out his hands. “I don’t see what the big deal is.”

Sitting back, Theo folded his arms. “I think we both know it’s never just a couple of drinks, Richie. Look at last night. Look at Oklahoma. And El Paso.”

Narrowing his eyes, Richie’s hands bunched into fists at his side. “I don’t see how it’s any of your fucking business how much I drink.”

Theo rose from the chair, green eyes penetrating. “Oh really? So I’m just supposed to put up with it? Take care of you every time you get so drunk you can’t walk and look the other way, is that it?” 

“Jesus _fucking_ Christ,” Richie threw up his hands. “So what if I like to drink? Would you leave me the fuck alone? Did you nag Martin this much? No wonder he fucking killed himself.”

Richie didn’t see it coming, but he sure as hell felt it. A hand collided with his face, all of Theo’s weight thrown behind it. Glasses flying, Richie stumbled and nearly fell. Righting himself, red-cheeked, he looked to Theo and any trace of his usual calm demeanor was erased. Face contorted with fury, Theo looked like a feral animal ready for attack. Eyes wild, nose flared, mouth a snarl, his chest heaved as he trembled before Richie.

“ _Fuck. You._ ” His deep voice shook. Snatching up his wallet, Theo strode out of the room, slamming the door behind him. 

_Shit._ Kicking himself once again for his runaway mouth, Richie stepped into his shoes and chased after Theo. He caught up to him moving quickly down the sidewalk, headed nowhere.

“Theo, _Theo!_ Wait! I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry.” Richie attempted to place a hand on his shoulder to turn him around, but Theo swatted at it.

“Get the fuck away from me, Richie!” Teary, Theo wiped his face, continuing down the concrete.

“Come on, hey,” Richie hopped in front of him, blocking his progress. “I didn’t mean it, okay? I’m sorry. That was a really fucked up thing to say.”

“You know, Martin,” Theo sniffed. “He was good to me. Right up to the end. He...he hid so much of what he was going through. I knew it was there and there was nothing,” he swallowed hard, looking nauseous. “Nothing I could do to stop it. When it happened I had no warning.” Theo chewed on his top lip. “I can’t do this, Richie. I can’t stand by and watch while another man destroys himself.” His lip quivered, and Theo looked up, blinking. “And I can’t do it again. I won’t.” 

Something hardened inside Richie. “Then why are you here? Why are you with me if it’s so goddamn difficult?”

“Because I’m fucking in love with you, you idiot!” Theo shouted, throwing up his hands. He knew they were out in the street in the middle of the day, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. “And you don’t...you don’t…” Theo covered his mouth, suppressing a sob and then hugged himself. “I’m just something you’re ashamed of. Someone you can fuck and then ignore whenever it’s convenient for you.” Shaking his head, Theo wiped his face and looked to Richie.

Clenching his jaw, Richie’s hands fidgeted at his side. “Well, if that’s really how you feel.” He stared hard at the ground. “Maybe you should just go. Because I can’t live up to the memory of a fucking dead man.”

Breath catching, Theo was silent for a while and then he nodded. “Okay. I’ll be gone by the time you get back. Goodbye, Richie.” Stepping past him without glancing up, Theo made his way back to the hotel.

Richie didn’t want to look after him, but he couldn’t help it, and as soon as he saw Theo disappear around the corner, a hurricane of wrath and self-loathing swirled inside of him. Screaming, Richie slammed his fist into the brick wall of the nearest building. “ _FUCK!_ ” 


	5. 5

Unable to tell if he was hungry or nauseous, Richie looked wearily at the clock. A little after four p.m. He’d managed to almost completely reverse his sleep schedule over the last few weeks, and as he stumbled out of bed to the bathroom, Richie groaned at the thought of being on stage in less than three hours. 

Emerging, he glanced around and his eyes caught the third of a bottle of bourbon resting on the hotel table strewn with a half-eaten pizza and one of Richie’s balled up shirts.  _ Maybe a little hair of the dog will make me feel better… _

__ Stumbling through the door, Richie was greeted by the portly manager of the Acme Comedy Club, who eyed him suspiciously as he swayed on the spot.

“You sure you’re okay to go on tonight, man? You look a little...rough.” 

Richie tossed a hand in what was meant to be a reassuring wave, but ended up overbalancing himself and had to take half a step in correction. “I’m fine. Don’t worry. I got this.” The manager narrowed his eyes, but nodded, leading Richie backstage. Once in the dressing room, Richie shoved a handful of complimentary pretzels in his mouth, chewing and breathing hard through his nose before slapping his hand around a bottle of water and tossing it back in its entirety. 

Laying his head back on the couch, shirt full of crumbs, Richie’s eyes were starting to drift behind his thick glasses when the voice of the manager startled him.

“Showtime, man.”

Snorting, Richie blinked and looked around. “Okay, yeah, good deal.” He stood, head spinning, and brushed off his shirt to make his way to the stage.

Richie’s hands were slippery as he attempted to grip the microphone and he could sense the dots of perspiration breaking out all over his face under the lights. 

“How are you folks doing tonight?” He slurred a bit. People clapped politely and Richie launched into his act. “So she says to me, she says ‘I hear anal sex doesn’t feel so good’...wait... _ fuck… _ ” Slapping a hand over his face, Richie grumbled. “That part was supposed to come at the end. I fucked it up.” Glancing out over the crowd, Richie’s vision began to dip and sway. “I just...I need to…” Groping behind him for the stool, he attempted to sit down, but missed. 

Crashing sideways to the floor, microphone bouncing with a reverberating pong, Richie’s teeth clicked together with a gasped, “ _ Fuck! _ ” Before he could push himself to a seated position, the strong hands of the manager were lifting him by the armpits. 

“Alright buddy, that’s it. You’re done.” Dragging him from the stage, Richie could vaguely hear the reaction of the crowd. Mutterings ranging from mild amusement to disgust, and as the manager tossed him out onto the Minneapolis sidewalk he barked. “Don’t ever come back. You’re banned.”

Richie wanted to make some snappy retort, but nothing came to him before the manager glared and disappeared inside. Picking himself up, he fished his phone from his pocket and requested a car back to the hotel. 

Head lolling, Richie snapped awake when the driver craned over his shoulder. “You’re here, man.”

Offering a hazy thanks, Richie made it to the hotel room and frowned when he saw the almost-empty bottle of bourbon. Thankfully the upside to being hoisted from his set so early was that the liquor stores were still open, so Richie wove a path back up the street.

Neon lights ahead of him, a horn blared as Richie strode into traffic without looking. “Hey fuckface, I’m trying to cross the road!” He shouted, giving them the finger. The driver was obviously shouting at him from behind his windshield, but Richie couldn’t hear as he managed to make it safely to the other side. 

Scooping up a fresh bottle, Richie cracked it in the brown bag, taking a swig before he returned to the hotel. Staring at a painting of pastel flowers, he took another, brown liquid searing Richie’s throat as it coated his stomach. Richie drank until he found himself rushing to the bathroom, crouching over the toilet, black curls dangling while he heaved up bile, grateful he was able to get his glasses off his face and onto the counter before they tumbled into the bowl. Weak and sweaty, Richie passed out on the bathroom floor, the cool tile refreshing on his cheek as he begged for the room to stop spinning.

Richie awoke to the sound of pounding. Groaning, he peeled himself from the floor and made his way to the door. An angry little woman stood before Richie, hands on her hips. “Sir, it’s 11:15. Check out time is 11:00.” She scowled up at him.

Rubbing his face, Richie mumbled. “Just charge me for another day.”

Nodding, she left with a huff and Richie closed the door behind her. Retrieving his glasses from the bathroom counter, Richie surveyed the room. As the events from the previous night began to piece themselves together, a tidal wave of shame rolled over him. Richie had never been banned from a club. Sure, there was that joint in Utah that said if he wanted to get on their stage again he’d have to ‘tone it down.’  _ But that’s fucking Utah… _

Drinking had never gotten in the way of his comedy before, and Richie eyed the remaining half bottle of bourbon sitting on the table warily. Gritting his teeth, Richie picked it up and promptly went to the bathroom, watching as the amber stream swirled down the sink. Picking up his phone, he called Bonkerz in Wisconsin and told them there was a problem with his flight. Richie hated to lie, hated to bail on a gig last minute, but some things were more important. Then, resigning himself and swallowing hard, Richie looked up the nearest Alcoholics Anonymous group meeting that day

***

Laying back in bed, Richie puffed out his cheeks, playing the drums on his belly. Sober for almost two weeks, he was doing a show tonight at the Funny Bone in Ohio and of all the things Richie had learned in working with his sponsor and going to meetings in the various cities, the most prominent was just how fucking  _ boring _ sobriety was.  _ Do normal people really just sit around like this all the time? _

Snapping up his phone, Richie scrolled through for a while, nothing catching his interest. Then, biting his lip, Richie brought up his contacts, thumb hovering over Theo’s name.

Richie:  _ Hey, how are you doing? _

For such a short message, it took him an incredibly long time to compose, and Richie took a deep breath before he hit send, closing his eyes and pushing his head back into the pillow.

***

Typing away at his computer, Theo paused for a moment to pinch the bridge of his nose. He’d been working hard on completing his new novel and Theo’s eyes grew tired of staring at the screen. Deciding it was time for a break and a snack, Theo left his office and padded his way to the kitchen, turning his phone back on. 

Biting into a crisp apple, Theo saw he had a text notification and opened it. He nearly choked on the crisp fruit when he saw Richie’s name. Five words. Just five words, saying volumes and yet nothing at all. Theo suddenly had the urge to hurl his phone across the room, but settled for laying it down firmly on the counter, forcing himself to take a deep breath.

Theo returned to his book but found his progress to be achingly slow, spans of minutes passing where he caught himself staring blankly at the blinking cursor on the screen. Frustrated, Theo powered down his computer, snatched up his keys, and decided to get out of the house in an attempt to clear his head.

Rolling into one of his favorite diners, Theo was directed to a corner booth by the amiable waitress. Theo placed his order, handing her the menu. Cracking his neck and peering around at the other patrons, a man caught Theo’s eye. The man was eating a large double cheeseburger. Well, eating wasn’t the word for it. He was consuming it as though the cow had done him some kind of personal wrong, gripping the bun in filthy hands, taking gargantuan bites that rolled around his open mouth, streaks of juice decorating his wrists and chin. 

Instead of the rightful revulsion, Theo caught a wide smile spreading across his own face. He didn’t know why, the man looked nothing like Richie, he was at least a decade older and considerably heavier, but his voracity was a dead on match.

Theo reached into his pocket, biting his lip as he stared down at the message. Tapping the table anxiously, he took a deep breath.

***

Toweling his hair as he emerged from the shower, Richie heard his phone buzz on the bedside stand and put his glasses on. 

Theo:  _ I’m doing well, Richie. How are you? _

Heart beating fast, Richie stared down at the message, contemplating his response.

Richie:  _ Better. Been going to AA meetings, working with a sponsor. Even doing some of that teletherapy. Just trying to get my shit together, you know.  _

Hitting send, Richie worried that he was divulging too much after their prolonged silence, but he wanted Theo to know.

Theo:  _ That’s great, Richie. I’m so glad to hear you’re getting help. _

Richie:  _ I miss you. _

Richie’s thumb paused. Closing his eyes, Richie hit send and waited. And waited. After ten minutes and still no response, Richie set his phone down, and curled over on the bed, hugging himself.  _ Well, what did you think was going to happen? _

***

They were expecting him to sit still.  _ Come on, let’s just fucking  _ go _ already. _ Richie sat around in a circle with the guys, talking and laughing, but his mind was elsewhere. Radio City. He couldn’t believe it. Never in his life did Richie think he’d make it to this stage. Sure, he was one of five comedians doing a showcase, but that didn’t matter, it was still an incredible honor. But the anxiety coursing through his veins was electric and Richie’s leg bounced ceaselessly as they cracked jokes, waiting for showtime.

Hearing a knock, Richie hopped to his feet. “I’ll get it fellas.” Throwing the door open, Richie was looking back over his shoulder and laughing, and when he turned around he gasped.

Theo stood before him, suitcase at his hip, tugging on his tie and staring at the floor. Dumbfounded, Richie’s mind was a desert as Theo shifted his weight nervously from foot to foot.

“I...I’m not sure why I’m here, Richie.” He finally said, swallowing hard. Slowly Theo’s emerald eyes rose to meet his own, and Richie broke. Large hands clasping both sides of his face, Richie dragged Theo to him, slamming their mouths together, an inadvertent mewl squeaking from his chest. Attached to Richie, Theo looked around open-eyed at the agog comedians on the couch behind them, unsure what to do as Richie broke their kiss and pulled him into a bone-crushing hug, petting his hair.

“Uhh...Richie?” Theo gestured with his head to the couch of men, arms hanging at his side.

Pulling back, Richie smiled. Then suddenly reality crashed down around him and his eyes expanded. “Oh,  _ oh… _ ” he turned to the guys like a rabbit frozen in front of an oncoming car. “I’ll, um...we’ll...just a minute.” Holding up a finger, he pushed Theo out into the hall and closed the door behind him. 

Richie cupped a hand to his face. “You’re here, I can’t believe you’re here.” Goofy grin spreading, Richie’s left eye became a sliver in his excessive joy. “I’m so happy to see you.”

“It’s good to see you too, Richie.” Theo took his hands. “But I...if we’re going to try again, I need,” he stared into Richie’s deep blue eyes. “I need to know things are going to be different. Are you sober?”

Nodding, Richie grinned. “Yup, one month day before yesterday.” Reaching into his pocket, he flipped open his wallet and unearthed a plastic chip, holding it up proudly.

“That’s great, Richie. I’m really relieved to hear that.” Theo nodded. Unable to help himself, Richie took Theo in his arms again, tucking his face into his neck. Theo’s arms wrapped around Richie’s broad shoulders, breathing in that sweet scent he treasured so dearly.

“Fuck, I missed you so goddamn much.” Richie whispered against his ear.

“Me too, Richie.”

Nuzzling closer, Richie’s stubble chafed him a bit and Theo could hear his breath catching. “And I just…” Richie’s voice grew thick. “I really needed you here today more than ever, and here you are.” Body shaking, Richie’s tears stained the shoulder of Theo’s vest as he rubbed circles into his back, swaying them gently.

“I’m right here, Richie. I’m right here.” 

Gradually Richie calmed, and pulling back he took off his glasses and wiped his face with his t-shirt before leaning forward and pressing their foreheads together. Quiet for a while, Richie rested his hands on Theo’s hips before taking a deep, shuttering breath.

“I love you, Theo.” Richie breathed, voice barely above a whisper. 

Tipping his head forward to Richie’s firm chest, lip quivering, Theo spoke against him in a shaky voice. “I love you, too, Richie.” Holding each other contentedly, it was a few minutes before Richie kissed Theo on the top of the head.

“Come on,” he grinned. “I’ll introduce you to the guys.” Richie reached for the doorknob, but Theo held his arm.

“Richie, are you sure about this? I mean, are you sure you’re ready?”

Shrugging, Richie sighed. “Honestly? No. But if I waited until I felt ready, I have a feeling I’d be waiting fucking forever. So let’s just get it over with.” 

Holding out his hand, Theo took it and they walked into the room. “Hey guys,” Richie waved. “Sorry about that, this is my, uh…”  _ Boyfriend? Lover? Partner?  _ They’d never discussed it and Richie had no idea which term to use. “This is Theo. Theo, this is John, Mike, Dave, and Andy.” Richie gestured around, making introductions. The guys looked back at him in silence, obviously a little rattled. 

Finally, John cleared his throat. “Oh, uh...I didn’t realize you were…”

Richie folded his mouth to the side, nodding slowly. “Yup…”

Frowning appraisingly, John shrugged. “Okay, cool. Nice to meet you, Theo.” He stood and extended Theo a hand, shaking warmly. “Want a beer or something?” Theo accepted a water and they all sat down, still about 15 minutes left to kill before the show. 

Richie draped an arm around Theo’s shoulder, feeling a fantastic airiness he didn’t know was possible as not one of the guys blinked. They continued on much as before, cracking jokes with ease, including Theo in the fun, and Richie even forgot for a moment about the prestigious performance ahead of him.

As the closer, when it came time for Richie to hit the stage, Theo followed, allowed to watch the sold out show from the wings. 

“You’re going to be wonderful, Richie.” He whispered, kissing him as they announced his name.

Richie smiled, shaking the nerves from his hands and walking out to the roaring crowd with a wave. As he spun his material before the 6,000 laughing faces, even though the familiar jitters danced over his skin, there was a serenity inside of Richie that he held onto, a touchstone he could return to when the lights and noise grew overwhelming or the sound of his own feet crossing the stage made him nervous that the laughter would never return. Richie found that spot and latched on, aglow in the light of comedy.

After finishing, Theo greeted Richie with a hug and a water. “You were so great, Richie!” He pressed a kiss to the corner of his sharp jaw as Richie downed the bottle, crinkling the plastic.

“Thanks, hun.” Swooping in for a kiss, Theo wound his fingers into Richie’s hands, enamored at the hint of a pet name as Richie’s hands began creeping their way toward his ass. 

Chuckling, Theo grabbed his wrist. “Wait, we should probably get somewhere a little more private.” He glanced around at the passing stagehands.

“Shit,” Richie folded his lips. “Come on then, let’s get the fuck outta here.” Stopping to pick up Theo’s luggage, they snagged a cab and Richie gave the driver the name of the hotel before affixing himself to Theo like a leech. The driver looked at them in the rear view mirror and snorted, but Theo couldn’t bring himself to care, Richie’s massive hands intoxicating as they roamed over his thighs, his chest, his ass. 

Reaching the hotel, Richie tossed a handful of crumpled bills at the driver, not bothering to count them and hauled Theo and his suitcase through the lobby. In the elevator, as soon as the silver doors slammed shut, Richie began palming Theo’s cock through his slacks, anxiously grabbing Theo’s wrist and putting his hand on his own stiff erection. Theo groaned in pleasure at the familiar outline of Richie’s long, thick cock, and when the door opened they were practically running to the room, Richie struggling to get the key card in the slot as his hands shook with desire.

Inside, lips locked, Theo pushed Richie’s jacket to the floor and Richie began fiddling with the buttons of his vest.

“Just fucking rip it.” Theo panted. Richie grinned mischievously, taking the fabric between his strong hands and tearing, buttons flying in all directions. Shrugging off the useless vest, Richie did the same to his shirt, exposing Theo’s chest and trailing his fingers over the lightly muscled flesh. 

Discarding the rest of their clothes, they made it to the bed, Richie lowering himself on top of Theo, anxiously grinding their cocks together. 

“Fuck, I missed you so much.” Richie said in between kisses, tossing his glasses haphazardly on the bedside stand.

Theo nodded. “I missed you, too, Richie. I missed the way you touch me.”

“Yeah?” Richie asked, encircling Theo’s cock with one of his sizable hands. “You like the way I touch you?”

Theo breathed against him “I love it. I love it, Richie. You feel so good.”

“Yeah, you like the way I play with your cock, don’t you, baby?” Richie stroked him, rubbing a thumb on the underside of the head. “Do I make you fucking hard?”

“Yes, Richie.” Theo whined. “So hard. I’m so hard for you, Richie, fuck. Let me touch you.” Theo’s hand snaked down between them, but Richie swatted it away.

“Uh-uh, no.” He nipped at the sensitive skin below Theo’s ear. “I wanna play with you for a long time. Don’t want you making me cum too early. Gonna make you scream my fucking name to make up for lost time.”

Fisting into Richie’s curls, Theo thrust into his warm hand. “Yes, Richie. Fuck. Please.”

Richie kissed and nipped his way down Theo’s chest before taking just the tip of his cock and wrapping his light pink lips around it, sucking for a minute before pulling off with a theatrical pop. 

“You like that?” Using the tip of his tongue, Richie stimulated the underside of the head of Theo’s cock. “You like when I fucking use my mouth?”

Hands in Richie’s hair, Theo desperately wanted to push him back down. “Yes, I love it Richie.  _ I love it.  _ Please,  _ please,  _ suck me.  _ Suck me, Richie. _ ” With a devilish grin, Richie swallowed his entire length without warning, inhaling like a vacuum cleaner and Theo’s hips rose from the bed, high pitched moan breaking from his chest.

“Richie,  _ fuck! _ ” Warm and moist, Richie’s throat undulated around him and Theo’s heels rocked him up and down on the mattress as he panted. Lifting off, Richie looked up at him, thumb rubbing the head of his cock with achingly slow circles. 

“You want my fingers in you? Huh? Would you like that?”

“Yes, fuck,  _ please _ !” Theo begged without hesitation. Scrambling up the bed, Richie grabbed the lube from the bedside stand before returning between Theo’s legs. Applying some, he rubbed two fingers over Theo’s entrance.

“You want it, Theo?” 

Theo gripped the sheets. “Yes, fuck, please.”

Richie ran his tongue over his teeth and crept inside, crooking his fingers until Theo’s mouth dropped open. Pulsing inside of him, Richie continued to tug on his cock, taking one of Theo’s balls into his mouth, letting it roll around languidly before replacing it with the other. 

As Richie took his cock down again, Theo was mesmerized by his mouth, the feeling of his slick saliva teasing and tantalizing as his tongue moved against his shaft.

“Fuck Richie, you’re gonna make me cum if you don’t stop.” Extracting himself, Richie climbed up the bed, kissing Theo and rutting against him with his now almost painful erection before freezing.

“Oh fuck.” He pulled back. “Please tell me you brought condoms. I don’t have any.” 

Theo chuckled. “Yes, despite not knowing exactly what my intentions were upon arriving, I came prepared. They’re in the front pouch of my bag over there.”

Jumping out of bed, Richie retrieved one and returned, applying it to himself along with some of the lube. Leaning forward, he kissed Theo passionately, tongues winding together for a few minutes before he pressed the head of his cock against his entrance.

“You want me to fuck you?”

Theo’s fingers trailed over Richie’s forearm. “Yes, please, Richie. I want you inside of me.”

Dipping down, Richie’s eyes came close to Theo’s face, so inflamed with lust they appeared almost black. “ _ Tell me how bad you want my cock.” _

“So badly, Richie.  _ Please. Please, fuck me. _ ” Theo brushed their lips together and Richie surged forward, causing him to gasp beneath him. 

“Oh,  _ fuck _ Theo, I missed you.” Richie groaned as he sheathed himself fully.

Wincing at the stretch, but drowning in the glory at being filled, Theo breathed. “I missed you, too, Richie.”

Wrapping his fingers once more around Theo’s cock, Richie began jerking him in time with his swiveling hips, angling upward to hit his prostate, provoking tinkling moans from Theo.

“Did you miss this? Did you miss the way I fuck you?” Richie’s stubbled cheek grazed Theo’s, peppering him with kisses.

“Yes,” Theo gulped for air. “I missed it so much. I love the way you fuck me, Richie. I love it.  _ I love it. _ ”

Resting his forehead on Theo’s, Richie’s wrist flashed between them as his hips rocketed forth. “ _ I love you, Theo. I fucking love you _ .” Richie kept repeating it like a prayer as Theo’s body seized up around him, crying out and digging his nails into Richie’s back.

“ _ I love you, Richie. _ ” He cried, quaking as cum shot across his chest. Richie wanted to make things last after their time apart, but the pressure around his sensitive cock was too exquisite, and with a broken whimper he came, one hand clutching Theo’s face, ends of his curls dancing across his forehead.

Folding into one another, Richie stayed inside Theo until he grew soft, only rolling apart when he had to get up to go to the bathroom. Coming back, he slid under the covers and Theo draped himself across Richie’s body, resting his head on his shoulder.

“You know, I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.” Richie said, tracing Theo’s lower lip. 

Theo played with his dark chest hair. “Well, for a long time I didn’t think I’d come back.”

“Why did you?” Richie gathered his eyebrows, realizing after he asked that maybe this was a scab he shouldn’t be picking.

Sighing, Theo adjusted himself. “I tried to forget about you. I really did. Tried to push you out of my head, think of anything else. But everywhere I went, everything I did...Something would remind me of you.” Theo swallowed. “Even in my writing…I noticed I was making up characters who were funny and sexy, the same kind of man over and over.” Theo smiled to himself, shaking his head. “Eventually I just had to stop lying to myself and admit that I missed you, too.”

“Well, I’m glad you did.” Richie pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“Hey Richie?”

“Hmm?”

“Maybe, um…” Theo swirled his fingers on Richie’s belly. “Maybe I don’t have any right to ask this, and you can tell me it’s none of my business, but...was there anyone else? You know...when we weren’t together?” 

Richie shook his head. “No. I mean, I considered it, but I think I was too much of a mess to pick anyone up for a while there.” Richie closed his eyes, remembering the hazy, shame-filled nights. “Plus, I...as much as I didn’t want to, even when I tried thinking about other people, you would crop up.”

“Oh yeah?”

Nodding, Richie squeezed Theo’s arm. “Yeah. Or like even on my own. I’d be trying to watch porn, and find myself thinking about you. And I’d get so fucking sad and angry, but then I’d be really goddamn horny, too. Very confusing.” He giggled and Theo rolled into him laughing. 

“Yeah, well, me too, Richie. I didn’t want to, but almost every time I’d find myself thinking about your hands…” Theo brought Richie’s fingers to his lips and kissed them. “Your mouth…” he outlined Richie’s lovely, slightly crooked pink lips. “And of course,” Theo raised an eyebrow. “That big, gorgeous cock of yours.” He ghosted his fingers over the bulge between Richie’s thighs over the sheet and Richie grinned. 

Silent for a moment, Richie hooked a hand under Theo’s chin, tipping up his face to meet his own. “Hey. I’m really sorry. About everything.”

Theo nodded. “Thank you. And,” his gaze slid away. “I think I should apologize, too. There was a hint of truth to what you said. About,” Theo swallowed. “About me wanting you to live up to Martin. I think when I met you, I kind of...projected a fantasy onto you and expected you to fulfill it. When you turned out to be human, I couldn’t deal.”

“To be fair,” Richie tilted his head. “I was kind of a dick, so I can’t really blame you.” Theo smiled. “And it’s okay that Martin means so much to you. You should always be able to have that.”

Theo kissed him. “Thank you, Richie.” 

Settling down into the bed, Theo notched himself into the curve of Richie’s body, one of his long arms tucking around him.

“Love you.” Richie whispered against the back of his neck.

Theo kissed his hand. “Love you, too.”

Breath syncing, they fell asleep, adrift on dreams of days to come, a lifetime filled with laughter and love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to anyone who took the time to read! If you enjoyed this, please leave a comment or come say hi on tumblr at fandomtransmandom


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